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Last night I was out walking my giant guinea pig when someone stopped and commented that they had seen a dog that looked somewhat similar, in a zoo in China. Apparently it was a crap zoo, becasue that was the only animal there, but that's another story.
Anyway, I got to thinking that with the upsurge
in plastic surgery capabilities and the fad for treating pets more and more like people, there was a lot of scope to have a bit of fun at the expense of innocent bystanders.
I'm currently nursing a semi-conscious Rottweiler at the moment, who now has a pair of surgically implanted goat's horns and a carefully modelled elephant's trunk grafted to its snout.
Other projects include a rabbit with wolf teeth implants and a cane toad with a mouthful of post & crown implants from a moray eel.
Soon, we're going to see if we can transplant a goldfish brain into a randomly selected politician, to see whether we can get a spontaneous IQ increase via this procedure.
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Get some rest, [UnaBubba]. If a newbie posted this, you wouldn't let them out of here alive. |
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I don't think I'd be too harsh on it. There is no necessity for foreign tissue transplants or immunosuppressants. All implants are inert. Any modelled flesh parts are from the animal's own tissues. |
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I've got a chicken, but it'd be nice if he was taller. |
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Cue Bart Simpson's pigeon-rat... |
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You're going to pay for this ... |
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//I'm currently nursing a semi-conscious Rottweiler at the moment, // What have you been taking to cause the lactation and isn't that dangerous on and animal with adult teeth? |
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But on to the idea, horns would be tough as you'd have to attach them to the skull and then have them pass thru the skin. I'm no doctor, but that sounds like a wound that would kill in minutes. I guess you could insert a metal plate and then mag mount the horns, but it wouldn't be easy. I know some guy had snaps installed in his skull to hold his toupee in place, so maybe I'm wrong. The dental implants and Rhinoplasty shouldn't be too hard, but don't expect them to be able to control the trunk. |
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I wonder if anyone has tried to make a living jackelope? |
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PETA isn't going to like any of this, but there is no PETA for politicians, so you could start there. |
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I have an elephant flea... it lands heavily, but it never forgets. |
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Xen, I imagine that if you got bit by such a flea, *you* would
never forget. |
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Eh ? Forget what ? Eh ? Have we had out tea yet ? Who are you ? You're not our son ... we fought in the War, you know.... whatever happened to that nice Mr. Attlee ? Eh ? Are there any biscuits ? Who are you ? We had one too, but the end fell of.... What are those green lights ? Eh ? Is it time for tea yet ? |
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