Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Unwiniser

Seekrymostfold
  (+18, -6)(+18, -6)
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Are you sitting comftiboldly, two-square on your botty ? Then I'll begin. Oh!

For so many a-shabbity morning did I upfolollopty thunk-it-thought of some methodibode for the obfiscation of the word in as manifoldy and as far but nought what mathification as what most do. What!

Then, quick-as-a-flash did come, like a spannaker fallalling, tinkatonkatankail from the skylode, did hit me bishety-bash, headwise on the noggin. “Aha!” did ping, and, while still reely-most from my deep-deep-thorkus, did tippety-tap on the board with keys for well upfold of a twenty mido fallupen.

So! What thorkus did I thunk-it-through? Well, dear beloved, let me tell it gentlymost in the earfold. Deep joy. A most importifold informatymosts is tippety-tapped in the computato, textwise thus. And then Oh! Deep deep joy, all the textinction becomes Unwinese as if by automaticles in the deepfold of electronicery.

Then, if beholdy by those not bewishing, info-fo matty-most therin, it makey no sense at all. "Oh blimeyfode!" They did call it. And furthermode, make it with the matheymost of the perga-greal-pringlecy understand it not without any hope of interception, what!

zen_tom, May 09 2005

More linkolde working what it's for it http://www.stanleyunwin.com/audio.htm
Oh yes. [zen_tom, May 09 2005]

A very strange series. http://www.tvcentur...ontent/view/85/126/
Not one of Gerry's best. [AbsintheWithoutLeave, May 12 2005]

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       that's a brilliant idea [zen], you're quite right of course, and what a perfect replacement for " Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit, sed diam nonummy nibh euismod tincidunt ut laoreet etc."
neilp, May 09 2005
  

       Deep joy. Oh yes.[+]
Not at all disappointybold, half-expectinglymost to find directions down the asphalt-toppy to alcofrol jolly-making in the houseyhold merchant off-sales.
Aside: Favourite Stanley Unwin anecdote - you know the experiment where you fill a custard powder can with a hole in the lid and in the base with town gas, and light the hole at the top, and there is a loud pop and the lid flies off? Unwin, in his youth, did the same trick with a tea-chest...
coprocephalous, May 09 2005
  

       + ! But, erm, oh yes! And from this will come a lot of modern work. I mean, after all, we will soon escape the televode or box with the square eyeballs, and it's far better to do a creaty-most, and if a forcus of music comes into the miload, so write down the stuffino takers or the tonic sol-fardy in the key of major or C or boo flat, any of these, in order to get it down handy down to the posterry, because it'll come out later on!
SpocksEyebrow, May 09 2005
  

       I'm greatly temptyfind encodiment of such in Micrasole Wordiho. Once keybty bash out in full on the computato, one presses the buttlymost and behold! Transfigglyhold of your text so plainimostfold into such befuddlence!   

       Another implementode would, as scriptyshell commandole, for pepoles of nerdlode. Oh yes, greetymost this with great and deep joy they would!   

       And sendimole down on the mail to all manner of friends and deep deep perslodes for the purpole of seekry transmisslode.
zen_tom, May 09 2005
  

       Confusybrain ouchyhurt.   

       Reminds me of Clockwork Orange.
Soterios, May 09 2005
  

       Linkole, oh yes!
zen_tom, May 09 2005
  

       Crapspackle! I go without understanding.
Acme, May 09 2005
  

       could someone suggest an Unwin-un-iser to make my head hurt less?
goatfaceKilla, May 10 2005
  

       //Reminds me of Clockwork Orange// Nadsat was cod-Russian.
coprocephalous, May 10 2005
  

       I don't like to do this in case it's seen as patronising (i.e. talking down to people) but re [goatface]'s request for an Un-Unwiniser, I would like to provide a taste:   

       //For so many a-shabbity morning did I upfolollopty thunk-it-thought of some methodibode for the obfiscation of the word in as manifoldy and as far but nought what mathification as what most do.//   

       Becomes(ish):   

       //For quite some time, I've been trying to find a method for the obfustication of words using many and wide ranging techniques, but without wanting to resort to mathematics, as many others do.//
zen_tom, May 10 2005
  

       Cheers, tom
goatfaceKilla, May 10 2005
  

       My eyes and ears are both bleeding...
shapu, May 10 2005
  

       sp: obfustication.
sp: worble.
+
;-)
Top links too!
gnomethang, May 10 2005
  

       EvilPickels <-------- Can't read a word in this entire idea. >_>
EvilPickels, May 10 2005
  

       zt, is this just an idea for a silly communication affectation?
waugsqueke, May 10 2005
  

       They could have been thinking the same things
DrBob, May 11 2005
  

       [ElDorado] yes, Stanley Unwin was the chap who did the Small Faces; Ogdens Nut Gone Flake album; I thought I'd got it right? Is it comftybold instead of comftyboldly?   

       [waugs] Yes and No. Yes, it IS a silly communication affectation. And No, it's not one of my invention.   

       The idea (such that it is) is to incorporate the affectation into the realms of cryptography so as to thwart the various statistical analysis methods that might count the number of vowels and whatnot in order to improve brute-force techniques at cracking a pgp style coded message.   

       In addition (as has been shown by some here) even with the Unwinese in plain sight, it proves tricky to understand to those unused to it, while (I hope) remaining reasonably intelligable to those who have Unwin 'experience'.
zen_tom, May 11 2005
  

       I remember Unwin (in a Gerry Anderson live action series - forget the name, and in Chitty-chitty-bang-bang) but I still don't understand [copro]'s anno.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, May 11 2005
  

       [AWOL] Unwins is an off-licence chain in the UK.
coprocephalous, May 11 2005
  

       Is this a Brit thing?
maximus5, May 11 2005
  

       Yeah, off-licences are liquor stores in the US.
coprocephalous, May 11 2005
  

       // They could have been thinking the same things //   

       Which is why they wouldn't have been reposting it.
waugsqueke, May 12 2005
  

       + I also thought of Jabberwocky.
Zimmy, May 12 2005
  

       AWOL, that'll be Joe 90.
DrBob, May 12 2005
  

       [DrBob] That'll be "The Secret Service" [link] - OK, so it was a semi-live action series. The one where the little guy got carried around in a briefcase.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, May 12 2005
  

       //Repost// + //The same things?//   

       Of what other things (affectations?) do you speak [waugs]? (notwithstanding Piratical Arrgghs, L'Imposteurment Francais and other bakery tomfoolery)   

       Also, I think it was a show called 'The Secret Service' (which I've never seen) - see link. Oh - thanks [AWOL] you beat me to it.
zen_tom, May 12 2005
  

       Ah yes, so it was. The old memory's obviously not what it used to be.

//Of what other things do you speak [waugs]?//

Tee hee!
DrBob, May 12 2005
  

       Looking at [AWOL]'s link [DrBob], I think your memory can be forgiven - it looks like many puppets were recycled between Captain Scarlet, Joe 90 and The Secret Service.
TolpuddleSartre, May 12 2005
  

       The smackly-dab next thingamabob, folksees grappling for the tip-top uppishness of pedantishness, observabalizing with theirish lookpeepers to the zeroe existanceometrage of a bog-standaboogled Unwinise grammarage or spellingforms. Oh bblimeyfode! Mightsy-should be creatitabbled.
RayfordSteele, Dec 13 2007
  


 

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