Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Volcano Golf

Volcano Links - Par 720.
  (+7, -5)
(+7, -5)
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There must be a suitable volcano field somewhere (Indonesia, Japan), where Consul Inc. could set up an 18 volcano golf course.

No need for daily hole changes and pin repositionings. No need for expensive fairway maintenance. No need for fartarsing about with buggies and caddies and all that sissy country club poser rubbish.

Get your hiking boots on. Sunscreen, hat, long sleeves and pants. Binoculars. About a gross of balls (old ones). Lots of Vegemite sandwiches. A tent. A pannikin. Some trail mix. Two sticks only - 1 x2 wood 1 x3 iron. Several stainless steel tees. Tiger repellant.

Take as many drops as you like for unplayable lies. Lie about anything really. Penalty strokes apply for hitting the locals (caution: these may be administered with a rattan cane in some areas).

ConsulFlaminicus, Mar 31 2008

(?) Volcano Golf Course http://www.volcanog...e/TheGolfCourse.htm
"Volcano Golf Course is one of the world's most unusual courses, on the rim of the active Kilauea volcanic crater." [Ander, Apr 03 2008]

Hole 16 - Vesuvius http://www.sandbank...golf.com/course.htm
My personal nemesis. [theleopard, Apr 03 2008]

[link]






       Welcome to the Mauna Loa open. Mind your boots! and don't tear the molten turf.
dentworth, Mar 31 2008
  

       Bun pending eruption...
xandram, Mar 31 2008
  

       Unlikely to appease the fire gods, and much easier just to toss in a virgin.
globaltourniquet, Mar 31 2008
  

       Tiki-Man say: "Gods not hut-hut like dirty used golf ball, need much Pepto after. Please send one (1) gross number-7 Titlist hut-hut overnight mail, much better. Also send more caddies. We hut-hut fresh out!"
Alterother, Apr 01 2008
  

       Volcanoes make devious golf holes [linky], but that makes it all the more glorious upon hitting a hole-in-one. [+]
theleopard, Apr 03 2008
  
      
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