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There is a wide range of body kits available for popular
cars, many of which claim to afford better streamlining
and/or additional downforce at speeds. But, having
bought one and duct-taped it in place, how do you know
Not-knowing -how-well-your-expensive- body-kit-is-
begone!! MaxCo. is pleased to introduce
Wind Tunnel Onastick.
The Wind Tunnel Onastick consists of a long aluminium
tube, tapering gently at one end. The tapered end is
so that the thing has an "L" shape. There is a grip on the
other end, at the top of the L.
A smoke canister is inserted into the handle end, causing
smoke to stream out of several cunningly-placed holes in
the short, thin arm of the L.
Simply hold this pole out the window whilst driving at
speed, and - gadulka! - see how your aerodynamics are
As a bonus, red, white and blue smoke canisters will
enable you and your friends to re-enact the two-
dimensional parts of a Red Arrows display.
||Ah, yes, the wannabe tuner crowd, who believe that
putting a wide-bore tailpipe and a spoiler on any car
will make it go faster.
||The most accurate non-wind-tunnel method for
determining the effectivity of a body kit is probably
manual calculation of your mpg. If the fuel mileage goes
up, the streamlined add-ons are doing something. If the
mileage doesn't change, at least your car looks cool (if only
to you). If the mileage gets worse and, as my esteemed
colleague [Dr. Quest] pointed out, the handling
doesn't noticably improve,
you're an idiot.
||Ultimately, race car performance comes at race car prices.