Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Yumminess Gauge

Get you kids to eat vegetables and other food perceived to be gross
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If you are responsible for feeding children, you may know what it’s like for some little brat take one look at a wholesome dish that you spent a lot of time preparing only to declare it “yucky” without even tasting it! As a countermeasure, I have invented a yumminess gauge. It looks like a large meat thermometer, but the dial is marked with Gross, Yucky, OK, Yummy, and Scrumptious. It doesn’t really do anything – you just set the needle manually and stick it in the food before you bring it to the table – but your family doesn’t know that.

It takes a little bit of skill to use it effectively. For instance, you don’t want to set it on Scrumptious then put it in a dish of brussels sprouts, because they’ll quickly realize that it’s a scam. For brussels sprouts, set it on OK, or maybe between OK and Yummy – just enough to get them to try it. In order to maintain credibility, save the Scrumptious rating for things like pizza and cinnamon rolls.

AO, Jun 25 2003

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       I'm facing a tough dilemma: fishbone for false science and information, or bun for a useful means to an end? Is the sweet, sweet taste of a custard filled croissant at the top of the scale?
Worldgineer, Jun 25 2003
  

       OK, AO. If you can make it work, more power to you. But, one of my least fond childhood memories is from my kindergarten days. Upon being convinced by someone that canned spinach swimming in vinegar was "good", I tried a healthy forkful. They were wrong. The school janitor probably didn't like dealing with the result. That "try it, it's good" trick only worked once.   

       Here, have a spinach croissant. It's yummy . . . really.
half, Jun 25 2003
  

       I forgot to mention that the gauge will come with an extensive list of foods and a suggested reasonable (maybe just slightly exaggerated) yumminess rating for each. Unfortunately there are some foods, such as canned vinegar spinach, that must be rated as gross for the integrity of the illusion.
AO, Jun 26 2003
  


 

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