Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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"Where Am I?" Bed

Where would you like to awaken tomorrow, sir?
  (+8, -4)
(+8, -4)
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A bed, which once it has detected you are asleep (breathing and brain patterns) quietly sneaks outside and makes its way to another location, where you have nominated you would desire to awaken.

May also be programmed to come and get you from a party, work or your local bar and take your slumbering form home to the comfort and safety of your bedroom.

Bulletproof; securely lockable; self-contained; seaworthy; roadworthy; all-terrain; flying with air-to-air refuelling contracted into the purchase price; self-driven and more comfortable than any bed you've ever known.

The BubbaCo Super Slumber marketing program employs the waking phrase, "Where Am I?" to the fullest extent of its meaning.

UnaBubba, Sep 29 2009

[link]






       Not even the grandparents of the builder of the oven that might bake this have been born yet.
loonquawl, Sep 29 2009
  

       + This is really the best idea that I have ever seen.   

       Imagine giving the gift of a bed like this to someone that believes they have been abducted by aliens.
vfrackis, Sep 29 2009
  

       That would be truly cruel and funny, [vfrackis]. Maybe you're not so bad, after all.
UnaBubba, Sep 29 2009
  

       "He's moving!" is the first reaction I'd expect.
reensure, Sep 29 2009
  

       [vfrackis], don't forget the extendable scythes that pop out quietly at night, and cut a crop circle in the grass around the sleeping conspiracy theorist.
DrWorm, Sep 29 2009
  

       I like that idea, [DrWorm]. Can't believe I didn't think of it.
UnaBubba, Sep 29 2009
  

       "E pur si muove!"
8th of 7, Sep 29 2009
  

       This idea evolved from the curious case of the agoraphobic AB, whom we carried asleep and in his bed, to the middle of a cricket oval in the early hours of the morning. We left him to awaken of his own volition, upon which he reacted very badly, screaming his pudgy head off.   

       The fact he was a fat, sadistic bully merely justified our actions.
UnaBubba, Sep 29 2009
  

       // fat, sadistic bully //   

       You say that like it's a bad thing ...
8th of 7, Sep 29 2009
  

       You never met this particular arsehole. He was roughly twice the size of ayone else in third form, at the time we "punished" him. I recall his favourite trick was to stand on your feet while he attempted to lift you off the ground by your ears.   

       The only time I ever got remotely close to squaring accounts with him was when I headbutted him in the face in a maul, on the rugby field. He was on my team at the time.
UnaBubba, Sep 29 2009
  
      
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