People with pacemakers for their hearts, implants in their brains to prevent seizures, blood-sugar monitors, and mechanical organs (hearts, etc.) all have one thing in common: Their implants need power.
Traditionally, the electrical power to run these implants has been provided by atomic batteries,
which run off of radioactive decay, and last some fifteen years or so.
As we can readily see, atomic batteries have certain drawbacks: radiation, and needing to cut the person open if the battery must be replaced, for example. Often these issues are somewhat reduced by sticking the battery near the outside of the body for access, and using a thick bone, or water-filled cavity to partially shield the rest of the body from the radiation. Good enough? You tell me.
I suggest that science may soon put an alternative method within our reach. Thus, before they exist, Virtucom is proud to introuce our new fall lineup of bladderies.
Bladderies are essentially open-cell batteries, in which the acidic fluid is supplied, and replenished by the human body itself. Vents allow the hydrogen gas to escape, and valves admit new fluid to replenish that lost via electrolysis, without allowing "contaminanted" liquids out.
As the name suggests, bladderies will originally be designed to be placed in the human bladder. As other fluids (tears, semen, mucous, saliva, etc) may also activate the bladderies, it should be possible to design special-use bladderies for placement in other areas, such as the tear ducts, and gleek glands.
Our main products will be designed for use in the urine bladder however, and for good reasons: As the bladder is producing stuff to expel from the body, any leakage from the bladdery in this area will be least likely to pose a danger to the human body. Additionally, the bladder contains the widest entry port, so that changing out expended bladderies, if necessary, would be more easily performed via laporoscopic surgery through this part of the body.
Some of you might argue that a bladdery could leak metal salts that are dangerous to the human body. Really? More dangerous than radiation?
Some of you might argue that accessing the human body via the urethra is enormously dangerous, and/or painful. Really? More dangerous than cutting the human body open?
Some may raise concerns about the fit. Granted, this could be an issue, but a battery can be made in any shape or size, and connected in parallel to achieve sufficient power. So too the bladdery, and I've heard rumors that the urethra can be stretched.
These are certainly valid concerns, but I suspect that in the end, a well-desgined bladdery could be a good competitor as far as overall safety is concerned, and the materials needed for production are probably easier to obtain, which could make this device economically competitive as well.