Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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This would work fine, except in terms of success.

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masochistic computing companion

It wants to be punished
  (+6, -1)
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Is your word processor slow? Is your internet access getting iffy? Is your boss giving you a hard time? This new desktop assistent begs to be punished. Comes with a USB voodoo doll (and accessory packet including everything from needles to a hammer) and an optional invent-your-own-torture extention maker.
Voice, Aug 29 2006

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       //USB voodoo doll//   

       I reckon that would make a catchier title. ;-)   

       Bun!
froglet, Aug 29 2006
  

       USBVD?   

       Sounds like a sexual disease you catch from Universal Serial Bus "interface".
webfishrune, Aug 29 2006
  

       "I click in your general direction!"
Ling, Aug 29 2006
  

       phlish: For you, we have the sadistic computing companion, which is unlucky enough to be tied up and unable to escape your torments. But you can see in its eyes how badly it wants to hurt you. Whenever it detects an error message the companion's eyes glow and it grins, as if it was the one who caused the error.
aguydude, Aug 31 2006
  

       Does it come with an an S&M version?
punk_punker, Jun 14 2007
  

       Voice, how long have you been computing? Surely you must realize what masochists we are for pushing a computer's "on" button in the first place.
Ander, Jun 14 2007
  
      
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