Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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sumo alarm clock

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2 model sumo wrestlers straddle this clock, grimacing and grinning menacingly as they slap their shiny plastic thighs and waggle their plump rearends. the distance between them is determined by the time set for the alarm - the longer the sleep allotted, the further apart are our wobbly friends.

every change in the digital display, as the seconds pass, moves our pair marginally closer.

the pair are set upon trembling stems at the base of their nappy [note to self - look up proper terminology ] to the top of the clock and are sensitive to the slightest motion in the room even a noise may trigger a response and agitate a fighter to a slightly more aggressive stance or a tad closer to triggering the alarm. ensuring that the clock is synchronised to your desired waketime, any out of synch sumo inching a fraction forward and the other will step back..

as the night passes, the wrestlers move inexorably nearer and nearer until finally they touch; hand to belly, head to head, or foot to buttock.

one sumo claims victory and stands proud, the loser falls to the ground.

the winning wrestler, determined by his final stance, tunes the radio station which finally brings you to a state of wakefulness.

po, Oct 10 2006

Let's mawashi!! http://www.e-sanpuk.../sumo/howto_en.html
Japan's important culture of tying. [ConsulFlaminicus, Oct 11 2006]

[link]






       just don't be rude with them.
po, Oct 10 2006
  

       mawashi (proper terminology)
ConsulFlaminicus, Oct 11 2006
  

       Hon-Basho!   

       Ding Dong!
skinflaps, Oct 11 2006
  

       As I read this I assumed they were real sumos (sumie?) as the idea came from po. I mean, if anyone would use real sumo westlers as an alarm clock, it would be po. They are real sumo westlers, right? with little sticks going into their er... nappies? standing at the foot of the bed grunting softly while you try to sleep? Please, please, pleeease, can they be real sumo westlers?
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Oct 11 2006
  

       No! sorry.
po, Oct 11 2006
  

       "...so I tried to get back to sleep for a while but I just couldn't get comfy. Anyway, I figured that I might as well get up seeing as my sumos were pretty much nose-to-nose anyway."   

       "???"
wagster, Oct 11 2006
  

       //"...so I tried to get back to sleep for a while but I just ..//   

       perfect for a film noir voice over intro...   

       //No! sorry.//   

       Aww, po. You never let me have anything. I promise to feed 'em and change their nappies and everything!
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Oct 11 2006
  

       Sumo Barbies?
skinflaps, Oct 11 2006
  

       Choice! I think I want one for my desk, just to have the two sumos inching backwards and forwards throughout the day.
DrCurry, Oct 11 2006
  

       Will it throw salt on your bed to purify it before bedtime?
shapu, Oct 11 2006
  

       thanks for the link, Consul.   

       gonna spend some time practising that.
po, Oct 11 2006
  

       Pass the extra long piece of material, please
Dub, Oct 12 2006
  

       Sure, [Dub], whatever you say. The "*extra long* piece of material", he says.   

       Gosh, I sure hope you're a guy or this remark will fall flatter than a piece of toast without a cat strapped to the unbuttered side.
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Oct 13 2006
  
      
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