My cat Hemingway has gotten old. She often falls asleep behind books on a shelf, or under a bed, or almost anywhere, really. Back when her hearing was good, I’d open a can of cat food and she’d come flying. But now, alas, sometimes she misses supper, not to mention breakfast.

And sometimes I can’t find her at all <wrings hands>.


Thus, the Hemingway Canticle. It’s a digital recorder with five seconds of memory. I push the button and play five seconds of Hemingway’s most salivating sounds, over and over at a greatly increased volume.

phuuuupk....phuuuupk...phuuuupk.

Works great! Now I can find Hemingway without using up an entire twelve-pack of cat food.


-- pluterday, Sep 17 2003

fatwa sam's http://www.fatwasam.com/index.htm
[thumbwax, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Walter Miller's "A Canticle for Liebowitz" http://www.imaginedat.net/miller.htm
"...Pound pastrami ... can kraut, six bagels--bring home for Emma...." [bristolz, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Think this could basically work the same way for Alzheimer's patients? You may be on to something there.
-- tatju, Sep 17 2003


Maybe by hiding and not eating the cat is trying to tell you something.
-- DeathNinja, Sep 17 2003


She was asleep. Sleeping behind a book when she heard a loud sound. She heard it again. It woke her up. Now it was dinnertime. Her owner would be waiting with some food.
-- AO, Sep 17 2003


I retract my previous statement.
-- DeathNinja, Sep 17 2003


Imagines [pluterday], up on the roof, in a minaret, 5 times each day.

Whiskahu Akbar!
Whiskahu Akbar!
Whiskahu Akbar!
Whiskahu Akbar!
Ash-hadu alla ilaha illwhiska
Ash-hadu alla ilaha illwhiska
Ash-hadu anna Pluterdayar Rasulwhiska
Ash-hadu anna Pluterdayar Rasulwhiska
Hayya alamezze
Hayya alamezze
Hayya alal-Hammour
Hayya alal-Hammour
Whiskahu Akbar!
Whiskahu Akbar!
La ilaha illwhiska
La ilaha illwhiska

-- UnaBubba, Sep 17 2003


Leibewitz (sp) would approve.
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Sep 18 2003


Bun for the uh, cat-call(?) to prayer.
-- thumbwax, Sep 18 2003


I guess I should expect a fatwa now?
-- UnaBubba, Sep 18 2003


//Whiskahu Akbar!//

<amused, pluter presses button on Canticle>
ha!...ha!...ha!...ha!...ha!...
-- pluterday, Sep 18 2003


BREAKING NEWS

Thousands of area cats disappear --on pilgrimage to local resident’s hillside estate. Conflicting reports of heinous laughter being broadcast from loud speakers. Details soon.

<giggles>
-- Tiger Lily, Sep 19 2003


Perhaps a catechism, to combat the Islamist yodelling?
-- UnaBubba, Sep 19 2003


A cattlechasm might work faster.
-- Tiger Lily, Sep 19 2003


To everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a reason (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time to use all purpose,
to make it leavend

A time to rise,
A time to sleep
A time for chillin' your idea to keep
A time to broil,
A time to flame,
A time for killin' ideas that are lame

For each invention (Turn Turn Turn)
There is convention (Turn turn turn)
And a time to bake it,
or just composte it...

(and thanks, rb.)
-- Tiger Lily, Sep 20 2003



halfbakery