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Food: Farming: Bee
Beekeeper's bee suit   (+10)  [vote for, against]
Fitting in

Suits worn by beekepers to protect themselves from stings are usually fairly unimaginative in design, concentrating on the functionality of stopping the wearer getting stung.

Bees sting when they are threatened.

The new BorgCo Bee Suit reduces the apparent threat to bees by making the wearer look like a bee themselves, complete with wings, and the appropriate number of extra limbs, a striped body, and rigid, lightweight, well-ventilated headgear modeled on that of a bee.

Since bees lack true binocular vision, they should be incapable of discriminating between an actual bee in close proximity and a human-sized bee some distance away.
-- 8th of 7, Sep 21 2017

Bumble Bee Plumbing https://www.youtube...RDo4ADis2f6AE&t=242
Skip forward to 2:24 [DrBob, Sep 22 2017]

Tap the honey from outside the hive. https://www.facebook.com/flowhive/
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Oct 05 2017]

Just bee-cause.
-- normzone, Sep 21 2017


This seems a fairly sensible idea
-- hippo, Sep 22 2017


It's genius, as long as the bees don't mistake you for a marauding hornet, or a lost queen.
-- Zeuxis, Sep 22 2017


Crocodiles have eye sockets on either side. This may explain why they so rarely fall prey to humungous bumble bees.
-- pertinax, Sep 22 2017


No, because bees eat nectar, not crocodiles. However, it is possible that crocodiles could be predated by giant wasps.

A giant wasp suit to allow humans to predate crocodiles would be a completely different thing, however.

// This seems a fairly sensible idea //

Oh dear ... yes, sorry.
-- 8th of 7, Sep 22 2017


//crocodiles could be predated by giant wasps//

Quite likely. Hymenoptera appeared in the triassic, a long time before the eocene when crocodiles arose.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 22 2017


The idea is not to alarm the bees.
-- 8th of 7, Sep 23 2017


Will you be offering yourself as a surrogate mother?
-- xenzag, Sep 23 2017


We are entirely unsuited to the role of parent, surrogate or otherwise.
-- 8th of 7, Sep 23 2017


but.... if you keep your suit on, then you're perfect....
-- xenzag, Sep 23 2017


No, again, the idea is not to alarm the bees.
-- RayfordSteele, Sep 25 2017


+ I want one...but don't we smell like humans?
-- xandram, Sep 26 2017


The suit is impregnated with bee odour. A spraycan of the odourant is supplied to refresh it as necessary.
-- 8th of 7, Sep 26 2017


How did they hold the binoculars to their eyes with those tiny arms they had ... ?
-- 8th of 7, Sep 27 2017


If you have to herd giraffes, do you get to wear a giraffe suit? Giraffes can be troublesome, and they're not good at making honey. Of course bees are not much good at juggling with coconuts, something that giraffes find to be child's play.
-- xenzag, Sep 27 2017


// do you get to wear a giraffe suit? //

If you so wish.

// Giraffes can be troublesome, //

Very true. Anyone who's ever had an infestation of giraffes will agree.

// and they're not good at making honey. //

On the plus side, they don't sting; but they do kick.

// Of course bees are not much good at juggling with coconuts, something that giraffes find to be child's play. //

Sadly, there's not much call for that any more, hence the shocking levels of unemployment amongst juvenile giraffes. Someone really ought to do something.
-- 8th of 7, Sep 27 2017


They're at their worst when they're just born. Not many people reaslise how problematic are the giraffe larvae as they swarm towards the nearest unsuspecting armpit, taking up residence as if they owned the place.
-- xenzag, Sep 27 2017


I beelieve we're just winging it now.
-- normzone, Sep 27 2017


Most people adhere to the old belief that giraffes evolved from an antelope-like animal whose neck and legs became longer under selective pressure, enabling it to reach the higher leaves of trees.

In fact, recent genomic data shows that the giraffe's ancestor was a squirrel-like tree-dwelling herbivore, which gradually evolved a long neck and legs in order to reach the ground.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 27 2017


And there was me thinking that giraffes evolved from some giraffe-like animal.
-- Wrongfellow, Sep 27 2017


Or perhaps waxing eloquent.
-- normzone, Sep 27 2017


//deliberate grammar and spelling errors.// ?
-- xenzag, Sep 27 2017


//giraffes evolved from some giraffe-like animal.// Ha - next thing you'll be telling us is that chickens start off life as miniature chickens and not as hard shelled blobs.
-- xenzag, Sep 27 2017


Ooh, THAT'S got to sting ....
-- normzone, Sep 27 2017


Here's me thinking of a wrap around beehive of hexagon weaving. Of course the suit has to be hung up in the same space-time orientation for the behavioral health of the bees.
-- wjt, Sep 28 2017


A beekeeper's suit covered with hexagonal cells would be interesting. Perhaps the beekeeper could harvest honey simply by standing still near the hive.
-- 8th of 7, Sep 28 2017


You're avin' a larva.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 28 2017


I don't believe that there is a //bee-odourant// and if there is - how to you put it in a can?
-- xandram, Sep 28 2017


You can buy it in Waitrose - it's two shelves to the left of the deodorant.

Alternatively, you can take a leaf out of [bigs] book: just bulk-buy rant and add your own prefixes.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 28 2017


There is some prior art - research indicates that some warlike Asiatic nomadic people who ravaged Europe in the 4th–5th centuries developed a small version of this to protect a lower leg joint.
-- normzone, Sep 28 2017


An already visited flower?
-- beanangel, Sep 28 2017


Hun knee ....
-- normzone, Sep 28 2017


If you have to explain it, it's not funny.
-- 8th of 7, Sep 28 2017


Ah. I was going with Goth ankle.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 28 2017


" If you have to explain it, it's not funny. — 8th of 7, Sep 28 2017 "

No, HUN KNEE. Fun knee is a common injury suffered by amateur sports enthusiasts. Often incurred by somebody attempting stunts with a good buzz on.
-- normzone, Sep 28 2017


Here's me thinking this place is so clever. I spent half a hour searching for the second tier humour. Got some good images of shin pads. though.
-- wjt, Sep 29 2017


This sounds like one of of those suits in which you spend your time, slowly staggering back and forth across a hot sidewalk, hoping you do not get stepped on.
-- mylodon, Sep 29 2017


Just thinking about it give me hives.
-- normzone, Sep 29 2017


// it give me hives//
> it. Give me hives.
> it gives me hives. (the bee home)

Either way, that's a good thing in this wild flower depressed social design.
-- wjt, Sep 30 2017


// it give me hives//

That's a pity, it's actually meant to give you a buzz ...
-- 8th of 7, Oct 01 2017


If bees had a pantheon, then Thor would wield an ax.
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Oct 01 2017


I'm a hobby-level beekeeper. Based on what I've read, and my experience, bees have surprisingly good visual discrimination.

Some years ago, they were found to have better facial recognition, in terms of being able to recognise individual faces at quarter-profile having only seen them at full-profile and front on than the best computer facial recognition of the time.

They also seem much more aggressive when I wear something fur-like - such as a jacket with a woolly collar. The explanation I've read is that they're responding as if I were a bear.

So, there's very likely some merit in this idea. I'll try to remember to wear something black and yellow next time I open a hive, and see what happens.
-- spidermother, Oct 03 2017


Thank you, [spidermother]. It's nice to get some professional input.

I've always noticed dying bees crawling on the shore at my local beach. If I had my druthers, that's where I would spend my final years anyway, but who would have thought they'd feel that way?
-- normzone, Oct 03 2017


// they're responding as if I were a bear.//

Hmmm. Have you actually checked that you are not, in fact, a bear ?

// So, there's very likely some merit in this idea. //

<offended sniff>
-- 8th of 7, Oct 03 2017


//I'm a hobby-level beekeeper.//

Fyfe Robinson, on being given a minuscule single-serving tub of honey with his toast at a guest-house, famously said "Ah! I see you keep a bee!"
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 03 2017


So ... I keep a hobby-level bee?

8th, No offense intended - I should have remembered how seriously you folk take your hive mentality.
-- spidermother, Oct 04 2017


In cinemas this season, the touching tale of a misunderstood man who only wanted to be assimilated.

"I'm not a borg! I'm a human bee-ing!"
-- spidermother, Oct 04 2017


" I'll try to remember to wear something black and yellow next time I open a hive, and see what happens. — spidermother, Oct 03 2017 "

Reminds me of when we had [Alterother] firing custom hand loads of flower seeds into pots of soil to test survival rates.

Halfbakers who will test theories deserve some kind of award.
-- normzone, Oct 05 2017


... or if not an award, at least some sort of contribution to their consequent medical expenses.
-- 8th of 7, Oct 05 2017


Like, one of those blue plagues, on the house where they were born ?
-- 8th of 7, Oct 05 2017


One thing about bees is that they're always free-range, which must be less efficient. Clearly, we need to work on some sort of battery bee cage, probably about half and inch on a side, that can be stacked in endless tiers in a temperature-controlled environment for year-round honey production.

This would have the advantage of creating a backlash, allowing existing beekeepers to sell their free-range honey at a premium.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 05 2017


//One thing about bees is that they're always free-range, which must be less efficient. Clearly, we need to work on some sort of battery bee cage, probably about half and inch on a side, that can be stacked in endless tiers in a temperature-controlled environment for year-round honey production.//

Interesting thought. I plan to try growing year 'round greenhouse flowers with a Flow-Hive [link] system which will allow me to collect honey without disturbing their nectar collection throughout the winter.

//you wouldn’t want a beekeeper’s bee suit, rather, a beekeeper’s flower suit//

Now that's not a half bad idea.
I've yet to see a bee sting even a single flower.
... let alone flower couples.
Flowers move around a lot in the wind, I bet a bee wouldn't have the capacity to realise that they can't stay moving and would think nothing of a living roaming flowering bi-pedal shrub-suit wandering around tending their reverse snow-globe.

hmmm
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Oct 05 2017


// a living roaming flowering bi-pedal shrub-suit wandering around //

Plastic flowers, hummingbird feeders, some pipework ... or a bunch (ha, ha) of those joke water-squirting lapel flowers. Happy, unstressed bees, no stings. Very doable.
-- 8th of 7, Oct 05 2017


I don't know how long fake flowers would fool them. I was thinking of a sort of suspended living flower/chia poncho growing in the ante-chamber which I would don before entering the main greenhouse.

This would allow you to control the flavor of the honey as well by having a wild-flower house, and a rose house, and a honey-suckle house, etc.

My wife and I are looking for a piece of land and I have been itching to try some of this stuff out.
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Oct 05 2017


You can get ointment for that now.
-- 8th of 7, Oct 05 2017


Yep, gonna be quite a spread... it rubs the ointment on its skin, else it gets the hives again.

It was a toss up for a while there between pursuing inventions or land ownership. After the miniautilus debacle I chose land. Less sharks on land.
Going to build me a little eden I figure. At least that way if the bastards try to take it from me I will get to see the whites of their eyes.
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Oct 05 2017


The chia poncho is (marked-for-tagline)
-- normzone, Oct 05 2017


Good luck with your Eden, [2fries], and beware bastards in sunglasses.
-- pertinax, Oct 06 2017


This needs a comparison study: bee suit, bear suit and no clothes at all to serve as a control.
-- doctorremulac3, Oct 11 2017


// no clothes at all to serve as a control //

Actually, given that some beekeepers don't use special clothing, smoke, or other aids "because their hives know them", and the "beard of bees" is a well known stunt, that might be entirely possible.

You try it first.
-- 8th of 7, Oct 11 2017


As Milton Jones pointed out, banning the veil isn't likely go down well with beekeepers...
-- not_morrison_rm, Oct 13 2017


Well, I remembered to wear black and yellow - black tracksuit pants, a black long-sleeved shirt, and a yellow polo shirt over the top. I used smoke as usual (I follow the advice of Dadant to use smoke routinely, as it makes it less likely that the bees will annoy others - even if the beekeeper feels safe).

I didn't expect definitive results from a single trial - you never can tell with bees - but I can report that they showed no aggression whatsoever towards me. Rum-tum-tum-tiddle-um.

I didn't open the brood chamber this time. That would be a better test, as they usually get rather pissed off when I do that.
-- spidermother, Oct 19 2017


Cool !

Thanks for that … but remember, we own the intellectual property.

Why not use Halloween as an excuse and make a full bee suit, as described in the idea ?
-- 8th of 7, Oct 19 2017



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