Perhaps, some scheme of sexual favors can be worked into the resolution amongst the cowboys and outlaws. But, I'd rather not change the plot much.-- daseva, Jun 19 2009 The Duke as Duke. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0023631/ [coprocephalous, Jun 19 2009] SNL transcript, will try and find the video clip. http://snltranscrip.../05hbrokeback.phtmlAnd some truths we can't deny... [4whom, Jun 19 2009] http://en.wikipedia...sbottom_Rides_Again classic British comedy western [xenzag, Jun 20 2009] I was expecting something more subtle.-- Veho, Jun 19 2009 Well, yeah. Of course, their accents would be completely different and... maybe a catfight or two? I know I'm probably not the one to be directing this, but I think there's a simplicity that must be preserved.-- daseva, Jun 19 2009 The <ahem> climax of Fistful of Dollars just won't be the same.-- Jinbish, Jun 19 2009 [jinbish] you owe me a new keyboard.-- coprocephalous, Jun 19 2009 Presumably the Law of the Conservation of Gayness means that you'll also produce a straight version of Brokeback Mountain?-- hippo, Jun 19 2009 //Conservation of Gayness// I believe the more lexically correct form is "Gaiety".-- Veho, Jun 19 2009 I'm not sure I'll ever recover from this...(jin, jin, jin...)-- blissmiss, Jun 19 2009 have you looked? this is 2009 after all.-- WcW, Jun 19 2009 As with a lot of hinting, just watch old westerns with what we know now. Just like the idea but without the crack. Ah begorra!-- bigsleep, Jun 19 2009 I am joining [copro..]'s class action against [Jinbish], that *was* a good keyboard.
There was a great skit on SNL about this, I will see if I can link. If I can't, remember this quote: "...Well, maybe we're digging for something more precious than gold..."-- 4whom, Jun 19 2009 He rode a blazing saddle...-- RayfordSteele, Jun 19 2009 //I was expecting something more subtle //
[marked-for-tagline]
If someone will direct us to the exit, we will be happy to run screaming towards it.......-- 8th of 7, Jun 19 2009 /a straight version of Brokeback Mountain?/
This could actually be very funny. It would need to stick closely to the pace and tone of the original to work.You-- bungston, Jun 19 2009 Sorry in advance...well not really.
Lone ranger and Tonto are riding through the desert. Ranger gets off'n his horse to take a leak and gets a rattlesnake bite on his pecker.
He says, "Quick Tonto! Get a doctor." Tonto rides hell bent for election back to town and finds the doctor, but he's busy birthin babies so he tells Tonto he must make an X incision on the wound and suck all of the poison out. Tonto near kills his horse racing back. The Lone Ranger half dead asks, "What'd he say Tonto? What'd he say?"
Tonto dismounts, gets right up close and whispers, "Him say...you gonna die Kemosabe."-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Jun 19 2009 *slaps foreskin*
Oops... meant to say *slaps forehead*. My bad...-- 21 Quest, Jun 19 2009 Strictly speaking very little would have to change. There is no reason that someone who looks and talks like John Wayne can't be gay, for example.
You could even probably exchange the backgrounds given current technology, replacing background artists with people performing sexual acts. However you could also replace the nearly compulsory wacky or ornery character with a camp one though, using the same technique.
The problem would be copyright, which is why the sex film remakes of regular films are always presented as satire.-- Aristotle, Jun 20 2009 //The <ahem> climax of Fistful of Dollars just won't be the same// Could there be a Fistula Full of Delores? Some westerns just crave a remake....Ramsbottom RIdes Again? (an Arthur Askey gem - see link)-- xenzag, Jun 20 2009 I'm greatly relieved that nobody has taken this as an obvious and irresistable cue to start a list of gay-themed re-titlings for well-known Westerns.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 20 2009 Nice one, [MB]. What's next from MaxCo ? How to extract malt and hops from beer ? How to herd cats ? Or are you going to explain how to cram a mushroom cloud back into that pretty, shiny little plutonium sphere you had eighty microseconds ago ?
In the legend, Pandora just opened the box, and that was bad enough. There was no need to go at it with a shaped charge, it wasn't even locked ....
"We thought we only told you to blow the bloody lid off ?"-- 8th of 7, Jun 20 2009 //What's next from MaxCo//
We are actually working on a novel and practical penis enlargement system based on non-Newtonian fluids. You heard it here first.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 20 2009 Does it involve pureed horny goat weed, enzyte, or viagra?-- 21 Quest, Jun 20 2009 It might.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 20 2009 //'m greatly relieved that nobody has taken this as an obvious and irresistable cue to start a list of gay-themed re-titlings for well-known Westerns.// except me ! How about "Cum Fight at the OK Corral" ? just to get the ball rolling.-- xenzag, Jun 21 2009 What about cowgirls? "Butch Cassidy and the Funpants Kid"?-- 4whom, Jun 21 2009 I have always had a problem understanding male/male cowboy relationships. It is very seldom that anyone uses the tools of their trade for recreational purposes. Picture this:
"Hey Wade, wanna hook up tonight!"
"Nah Darrel, we got an 80 mile ride tomorrow and I left my saddle cushion at the ranch."
I suppose that would be "How the West was Worn-out."-- 4whom, Jun 21 2009 OK, last one. "The Wood, the Bad and the Ugly".-- 4whom, Jun 22 2009 And for that, [4], you deserve no mercy whatsoever.-- 8th of 7, Jun 22 2009 I know, I know [8th...]. It is not big, and it is not clever...-- 4whom, Jun 22 2009 I can't but mention one of the classics of the Western genre, "A Fistful of Dynamite", A.K.A. "Duck, You Sucker".-- Veho, Jun 22 2009 Broke Back Mounting? I have many more, but they'll keep.-- xenzag, Jun 22 2009 //they'll keep// Are you sure? That last one might have gone off already. ;)-- zen_tom, Jun 22 2009 [zen-...] its no more *off* than "Bed Kelly". Or "All the Pretty Hoses", "Hid-dildo", "Lonesome Glove" and "Dildorado"! I am sorry, OK, no more!-- 4whom, Jun 22 2009 You're not wrong - but you never made any claims of freshness! The best I had was Village (People) of The Damned, but that's not even a Western.-- zen_tom, Jun 22 2009 With existing titles like Rough Riders, The Virginian, The Quest, Pistols 'n' petticoats, Bronco and The Big Valley it really doesn't leave much scope for rebranding. [edit: just to bring xenzag up to speed, broke back mountain was a gay western]-- bigsleep, Jun 22 2009 Hahah.. Oh, [zen], you card, you.-- daseva, Jun 22 2009 You cannot Top the ol' [Jinbish]. Don't even try.-- gnomethang, Jun 22 2009 //broke back mountain was a gay western// Well my version has extra gayness! In fact even the horses are gay in it.-- xenzag, Jun 22 2009 Nay! Unbridled Passion?-- gnomethang, Jun 22 2009 Roy Rogers Trigger (except that's called Bestiality) - I'm barely started here.-- xenzag, Jun 22 2009 Beam me up Scotty.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 22 2009 Broke back mountain II - now with extra gayness.
Yeah, that does sound ok.-- bigsleep, Jun 22 2009 //Beam me up Scotty// That gives me another idea.... Liberace Themed remakes of Star Trek Episodes.-- xenzag, Jun 22 2009 Make it sew.-- Jinbish, Jun 22 2009 halfbakery