I'm envisioning a shop franchise along the lines of Sharper Image or Hammacher-Schlemmer. The half-croissant on the plate and the 'halfbakery' Impact logo would grace the arch above the entry way.
Once inside, patrons could browse through a large assortment of merchandise, including everything else in this category. The t-shirt and apron would be available, as would the book and a 365-day desk calendar.
Also, the store would stock certain halfbaked items which were baked to be sold there, such as the Gore-Tex™ Mouse, Fake Sleeping Cats, Bog Roll Alarm, and of course, Cream Cheese Rings.
New products would be added as development allowed. Old products would be removed periodically, and would be indicated as such by a small [marked_for_deletion]* sign on the shelf. (*obfuscated to evade the authorities).
Of course there would also be a counter where freshly baked croissants would be served. And you'll never get a penny in your change.-- waugsqueke, Aug 31 2002 Only if everything is half off.-- DrCurry, Aug 31 2002 once inside, you can never find your way out. +1-- po, Sep 01 2002 I could sell a pitbull to an three-legged cat - count me in as part of the sales force-- thumbwax, Sep 01 2002 A pecentage of sales of items can go to the person who came up with the idea.-- Gulherme, Sep 01 2002 Satisfaction guaranteed or we give you the missing half back. Uhhh. no.-- reensure, Sep 01 2002 <on purpose title misinterpretation>"Well. I'm sure we can help you, Sir. Here's our popular 110+220+12 volt outlet, and of course the halfbaked, rotation outlet, the cat-safe outlet...what, plugs? Why you'll have to go to the Halfbakery Plug Store across the street."</on purpose title misinterpretation>-- FarmerJohn, Sep 01 2002 Wednesdays would, of course, be "Half-Day Closing", a peculiar, rural British (Scottish?) custom of shutting up shop at midday on Wednesday because - well, just because.-- Guy Fox, Sep 01 2002 We do that in England still? someone should really tell the shop keepers in my town, don't want them to look stupid.-- kaz, Sep 01 2002 They do that in Tarporley, about 10 minutes from here, but I've never come across it anywhere else.What would your town be then kaz?-- NickTheGreat, Sep 02 2002 The main department store in Reading (Heelas) doesn't bother with half days. They simply don't open at all on Monday, and haven't done so for years and years.-- PeterSilly, Sep 02 2002 'John Smiths' (UK) is closed on a Monday as well. The simple logic is that its the quietest day of the week.-- Jinbish, Sep 02 2002 Monday is market day here in Darlington. Everywhere's open, even on Bank Holidays. Early closing is officially Wednesday, but most shops stay open these days.-- angel, Sep 02 2002 Yeah, everybody needs an outlet. Are you proposing a box for rants. Hang on I'll just read the idea.......
.....Damn, you're not. I had a really good rant all lined up. Could the shop have an area where half bakers toil on bringing their ideas to full baked status. A bit like the pizza resturants where you get to watch the italian stereotype throwing the dough?-- Zircon, Sep 02 2002 And custard, lots of custard.-- UnaBubba, Sep 02 2002 Someone should actually bake the 365-day HB calendar.-- RayfordSteele, Sep 02 2002 Are you working right now?-- UnaBubba, Sep 02 2002 Do any of you work? Ever??-- briandamage, Sep 02 2002 Not really.-- UnaBubba, Sep 02 2002 Occasionally, I pretend to woik anyway.-- madradish, Sep 02 2002 Pneumatic Hamster Tube Kit.-- BinaryCookies, Sep 02 2002 Sofa-Storage-Solution-- briandamage, Sep 02 2002 Portable Bernard Bresslaws would be available to hold your place in the cashier queue.-- waugsqueke, Sep 02 2002 Nah, a half-baked Farmer's Almanac should have the predictions without the dates. (Just like Nostradamus, really.)-- DrCurry, Sep 03 2002 Alternatively it could just have the dates with no predictions. 17 October.-- PeterSilly, Sep 03 2002 Er...that would be a calendar, Mr. Silly.-- DrCurry, Sep 03 2002 My good doctor, it would only have the dates in it when something is predicted to happen. So the date listed after 17 October may well be 3 February.-- PeterSilly, Sep 03 2002 Krasny Oktyabr?-- UnaBubba, Sep 03 2002 bliss: I wouldn't say that. PeterSilly: Ah. I have a clock like that. degroof: a torando - that's like a Gila monster, right?-- DrCurry, Sep 03 2002 <smacks Rods>-- madradish, Sep 03 2002 That's the problem with calendars: Time keeps running out on them. Fickle things, they never seem to be seen with the same date from one day to the next.-- UnaBubba, Sep 03 2002 halfbakery