Arrive early for the interview. Notice moat. Look for a way across the moat. Barring a drawbridge, use ingenuity to cross moat. Once in the building, follow the road map carpet tiles to the internal water transportation area. Paddle raft down lazy river (making sure the transparent tie doesn't get wet). Meet up with the other applicants. Once everyone who is going to make it has, proceed to cubicle area (being mindful of corridor etiquette). Once in the cubicle area, applicants are divided into two teams and a round of cubicle crosswords is played. The losing team is dismissed en masse and get to tell their friends that the didn't want the job in the first place. The remaining applicants proceed through a cubicle maze. The first applicant to complete the maze gets the job and is promptly provided with a siesta voucher, self-leveling executive chair and a free ride home courtesy of CarryMeHome.com.
{Note: Human Resources is not opposed to a nominal job interview 'deposit' (to help grease the skids as it were).}-- phoenix, Oct 19 2001 Modern moats http://www.halfbake...idea/Modern_20Moats [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] 'Road marking' carpet tiles http://www.halfbake...27_20carpet_20tiles [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] Lazy River office http://www.halfbake...zy_20River_20Office [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] Transparent tie patterns http://www.halfbake...nt_20Tie_20Patterns [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] Corridor etiquette http://www.halfbake...orridor_20etiquette [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] Cubicle crosswords http://www.halfbake...cle_20Crosswords_2e [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] Make a maze http://www.halfbake...dea/Make_20a_20Maze [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] Resumes for people who don't really want the job http://www.halfbake..._20Want_20The_20Job [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] Siesta vouchers http://www.halfbake...a/Siesta_20vouchers [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] Self-leveling executive chair http://www.halfbake...20Executive_20Chair [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] CarryMeHome.com http://www.halfbake...a/carrymehome_2ecom [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] Interview deposit http://www.halfbake...interview_20deposit [phoenix, Oct 19 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004] Superb. I think I'll apply for a research grant to investigate the productivity losses to world industry caused by posting work-related ideas on 1/2bakery. Research will primarily be practical in nature, and I envisage it taking at least 5 years.
We must all have really boring jobs.-- pottedstu, Oct 19 2001 PeterSealy: Wow; what was the point? The obviously correct thing is to not answer the phone, and let it fail over to the answering machine any reasonable company (even in the 80s) would have.-- egnor, Oct 19 2001 Presumably, you would be able to tell after a few zillion rings that that isn't going to happen.-- jutta, Oct 19 2001 Nice.-- iuvare, Oct 19 2001 Me, I wouldn't answer it if for no other reason than the person on the other end is going to want to ask a question of some sort that I would have no idea how to answer. 'Is Bill there?' 'Did you know I put anthrax on that handset?' 'What kind of oil does your moss covered three handled gredunza use?'...-- StarChaser, Oct 20 2001 Baked: The SAS.-- sdm, Oct 20 2001 [sdm], A guy I knew years ago tried out for the SAS. They were given a six-by-six foot trailer with one wheel (the other wheel and tyre were in the trailer). Four men were told to move the trailer six miles through swampland in two hours or so, without fitting the other wheel to the trailer. They were told they would not be watched or supervised, but they would fail if they succumbed to the urge to fit the wheel.
This was only one of a series of tests they were required to undergo. Eventually Stuie made the grade and the instructors went off to a bar with the two successful applicants to have a drink. The instructor said to them on the way in, "Gee, could you imagine a bar like this in a place like Finland, or Russia?" Stuie ordered a Rum & Coke. He was returned to his original unit the next day.-- UnaBubba, Oct 25 2001 No, you've also failed the test. Your lollipop is in the mail.
I don't have to do anything, apparently.-- UnaBubba, Oct 25 2001, last modified Oct 26 2001 So much better than all that talking and feigning interest. +-- pigtails_and_ponies, Apr 14 2007 What if you don't want the job!? Do you still get the job if you act like you don't want the job after running the obstacle course?-- quantum_flux, Apr 14 2007 hehe, I love this---find your croissant. +-- xandram, Apr 09 2008 Jobstacle Course! Superb! // Pass me my water-wings-- Dub, Mar 30 2009 Nice use of the various ideas. For the job I am in they have an aptitude test where you are given 45mins to answer 30 questions which require rapid maths guess work eg is this value below 10%, 10%-20%, above 20% for 3 variables.
Out of about 25 applicants all but 4 were sent home.-- miasere, Mar 30 2009 I like this. Especially at call centers, which seem to call out like a siren to all of the morbidly obese and otherwise grossly out-of-shape people in the city, people who don't have legitimate medical excuses for being overweight, but got that way by making a lifelong career out of working at call centers where they sit in their chair and munch on junk food all day, all the while basking in the power they wield over their customer's accounts, secure in the knowledge that no matter how rude, snobbish, or officious they come across, their hapless victims cannot find them. I truly feel that call centers should have appearance standards that go beyond a rarely-enforced dress-code.-- 21 Quest, Mar 30 2009 //their hapless victims cannot find them//I get amazing service from <mfr> when I happen upon a "service tech" stuck in stupid-mode by mentioning "oh why don't I come by, I can be there in 10 minutes" (which I can) and the more they've been an asshole to you the faster they then want to *actually* help for some reason. This is in contrast to <other mfr>, 400 miles away: when I was passing through their city I detoured 5 miles just to piss on their porch; fortunately for their reception area carpet it was a holiday.-- FlyingToaster, Mar 30 2009 halfbakery