Halfbakery: Song: N-Z
Paranoid Things   (+14)  [vote for, against]
First verse by [2 fries shy of a happy meal] from an original idea by [rcarty]

Tin-foil lined ball caps to block brain-transmissions,
Being watched night and day quite against our volitions,
Blacked-out car windows and panel-van stings,
These are a few of my paranoid things.

Black helicopters and cellphone emissions,
Closed circuit TV and nuclear fissions,
Drone strikes and smartbombs and submarine pings,
These are some more of my paranoid things ...

Little grey spacemen in their flying saucer,
Area 51 and drugs in the water,
Chemical contrails from planes with no wings,
I've got a long list of my paranoid things ...

Mormons and Templars and sneaky Freemasons,
Camouflaged landing strips in strange locations,
Crop circles, ley lines and ancient stone rings,
All of them counted as paranoid things ...

Night vision goggles and secret brain implants,
Cloning dictators and test xeno- transplants,
Secret codes hidden in some cellphone rings,
There's really no end to my paranoid things …

Men in white coats and a cop with a taser,
Unwanted injections and a funny white blazer,
The one with the straps, and the buckles and rings …
THEY'RE TAKING ME AWAY FROM MY PARANOID THINGS !"

-- 8th of 7, May 28 2014

I thought for a moment all the annos had been deleted
-- pocmloc, May 28 2014


No, that's just an implanted false memory …
-- 8th of 7, May 28 2014


[+] suggestions: "I've got a long list of my paranoid things" is a syllable too long. "I've got a long list of paranoid things" fits the meter better. "Being watched night and day quite against our volitions," is one syllable too long. Suggest removing "quite" "Area 51 and drugs in the water,"-->"Area 51; drugs in the water,"
-- Voice, May 29 2014


// Can't somebody somebody record this and do the video ? //

Complete with subliminal frames inserted, presumably.

Have you tried recording it, then playing the recording backwards … ?

[Voice], yes, agreed, it does need a bit of tidying up. It would be helpful if we could listten to the origninal that's being spoofed, but every time it gets to "whiskers on kittens" the sound of screams of rage and projectile vomiting drowns out the rest …
-- 8th of 7, May 29 2014


[+] yes! And all those conspiracy theories!
-- xandram, May 31 2014


[+] yes! And all those conspiracy theories! — xandram, May 31 2014

Got tired of typing, "what she said".
-- blissmiss, May 31 2014


To make the "volitions" line scan, you may have to coin a neologism, as in "Omni-surveillance against our volitions".
-- pertinax, Jun 02 2014


This is missing the chorus. I propose the following ... (ahem):

When the exi -
Stential angst bites
Like an early frost,
I simply remember my paranoid things,
And then I don't feeeeeel ... so lost.
-- pertinax, May 30 2021



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