Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Replace Cyclic Diagrams

Those circular or looping or recursing business process diagrams
  [vote for,

[need a category business|process or something] Replace all those posters on the wall or in documentation that have circular or looping or recursing flow of process steps, regarding the way to do a part or aspect of your own business.

Replace them with derisive laughter and a resigned attitude of failure, and a general air of not taking seriously. This is because it must be a bit of a clue for all concerned that because you end up exactly where you were after all that work, that the job itself must be a pointless waste of time and effort, therefore is doomed to depress and downheart all concerned.

Or, replace them with linear process step diagrams that show you've actually got somewhere further than where you started, and that things can actually progress and results can happen.

This will cause the economy to repair.

Ian Tindale, Mar 02 2017

Had an office full of these at my last corporate job https://despair.com/
And no one ever noticed [theircompetitor, Mar 02 2017]


8th of 7, Mar 02 2017

       I think there's a misconception here. Most cyclic diagrams, as used on Powerpoint presentations, etc., are actually bullet-point lists arranged in a circle because the presenter has heard somewhere, perhaps while quaffing ale at the pub, or while playing golf, that it's a good idea to add some variety into their tediously dull presentation and not have very single one of the 58 slides of time- wasting dross be a nearly-identical bullet-point list. So cyclic diagrams probably help prevent people in the audience from stabbing themselves in the eyes with the complimentary biros out of sheer boredom, but on the other hand are inaccurate and misleading.
hippo, Mar 02 2017

       The first slide could show the basic process.   

       The second slide could show the same process, repeated.   

       The third slide could show the same process, repeated.   


       Then for a sudden surprise, the 50th slide could show the business swapping to a new buzzword and system for a while.
Ling, Mar 02 2017

       You know the ones I mean - a shape with words in, followed by an arrow (which itself might be also a container for words) leading to another shape, another arrow, etc, finally looping back to the first shape. Arranged in some kind of circular shape, such as a circle. Usually all in blue. I think these are harmful and must be stamped out. It sends a message that after you've done all those steps - done all that work - you're back in the same place again and it never ends. This isn't a good message for industry to embody on a daily basis, and is entirely to blame for the current situation of hopeless contraction.
Ian Tindale, Mar 02 2017

       If there's a goal, the idea of potential failure is introduced. A cycle means you never get anywhere, which means there's no pressure.
nineteenthly, Mar 02 2017

       In some (a few) cases, the circle is actually meant to denote a 3D spiral, whereby after you've completed the 'cycle', you actually end up at the same place but slightly higher/ better/ further along (or, if you failed to complete the cycle as per slides 1 through 57, lower/ worse off/ further behind). Sadly, this 'cycle' is most often depicted by posters and slides which are 2D, by people who are 2D.   

       To hasten the demise of the cyclic diagrams, perhaps we need stop-gap invention: a motion(interest/ attention?) sensor poster that springs out at you, 3D-like, to imprint the (dis)information on the unsuspecting 'serious' viewer.   

       <cue fun-house derisive laughter as now-useless 3D-sproing hangs from the poster with an air of resignation>   

       Note: I'm sure this could be adapted to slideshow viewing, now that we all have our handy 'box your phone came in' VR goggles.
Sgt Teacup, Mar 02 2017

       Circular diagrams are ok if you add summer holiday and xmas party.
bigsleep, Mar 02 2017

       (1) Find PowerPoint presentation
(2) Check for cyclic flowcharts
(3) Eliminate cyclic flowcharts from presentation
(4) Go to step (1)
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 02 2017

       Even the PDCA cycle ( Plan, Do, Check, Act ), which has the goal of change to a process, is presented as a circular loop.   

       And most organizations get caught up in Planning and Doing, without the other two.   

       And then there's those outfits that only Check and Act, omitting the Planning and Doing.   

       And to think I thought it was a good idea to get involved in this field.
normzone, Mar 02 2017


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