Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Self cleaning dining room table

No tablecloth needed
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A circular table with a perforated top, holes large enough that most bread crumbs and spills will fall through. Spills fall on to a non-stick coated disk below the tabletop, spun at high speed by an electric motor.The disk is surrounded by a similarly non-stick coated perimeter wall with one opening, so everything eventually gets thrown out that hole. The hole is connected to a chute that ejects to a garbage bin or compost pile outside of the house.

Depending on length and angle, the chute may require some kind of internal blower or conveyor belt to make sure all of the debris ends up outside.

a1, May 30 2021

Inspired by Spinning_20Lens_20Glasses
Cleaning with centrifugal force [a1, May 30 2021]

[link]






       When I wipe a table after a meal, a fair proportion of what I'm wiping is viscous (or, in some cases, candle wax).
pertinax, May 30 2021
  

       //If ovens can have a self-cleaning pyrolytic function, then I'm sure tables can// - haven't you just reinvented the barbecue?
hippo, May 30 2021
  

       The perforated top is unnecessary. You could just have a small support platform for each plate, glass, fork, etc. supported on slender black anodized support arms.
pocmloc, May 30 2021
  

       Do we support elbows?
pertinax, May 30 2021
  

       If the top is TOO open (with just small platorms for plates, etc), it would be too easy for kids to get rid of food they don’t like - “Oops, there goes the broccoli! Sorry Ma, it was an accident!”   

       But it might be fun to watch roundish foods - from peas to brussel sprouts to those little red potatoes - go for a spin before they reach the ejection port.
a1, May 30 2021
  

       How dangerous it would be to get a finger in there?
Mindey, May 31 2021
  

       //How dangerous it would be to get a finger in there?//   

       Ten times, max.
AusCan531, May 31 2021
  

       I would think if the finger was still attached, it would be entirely safe, since the rotating surface is nonstick coated.   

       If you accidentlyy severed a finger you would be in trouble though, since the severed finger would be whisked away into the disposal chute before you had time to get it re-attached.   

       I'm slightly concerned about the degree of nonstickness. If the surface is nonsticky enough then anything dropped on it will just sit there quivering, no matter how fast the rotation.
pocmloc, May 31 2021
  

       // slightly concerned about the degree of nonstickness //   

       That’s the cleverest thing anyone has said so far, better than the original idea.   

       Even Teflon has a non-zero coefficient of friction, so it will impart some momentum to anything dropped onto the spinning disk. If the surface really is too slick though, it doesn’t have to be perfectly flat. A series of shallow grooves, bumps, or gradual undulations might help. Then the engineering challenge is to maintain balance, efficiency, and low noise while still moving things out to the edge.
a1, May 31 2021
  

       //shallow grooves, bumps, or gradual undulations//   

       ... awaiting a stylus.
pertinax, May 31 2021
  

       MINDEY just gave us the finger. Naughty naughty. (You are not supposed to go missing you hear???)
blissmiss, May 31 2021
  
      
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