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The problem with roomba vacuum cleaners is they can't clean stairs.
The Aardvac solves this problem.
Here's how it works:
Aardvac, as the name suggests, looks like a small aardvark. Place it at the bottom of a flight of stairs and it will start climbing, using its motorised smart legs to
maintain movement and balance. Aardvac’s proboscis snout systematically traverses each of the stair steps sucking up every speck of dust and dirt.
All vacuumed material is stored conveniently in the Aardvac’s belly.
Aardvac will plug itself in for recharging when necessary.
Set it in “periphery” mode and Aardvac will rove around the perimeter of any room sucking out material from where the floor meets the skirting board, an area that ordinary roombas back away from.
Deluxe Aardvac comes with a luxury furry back to double up as a foot rest, instead of being put into storage when not in us.
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This idea, quite literally, sucks (+) |
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I wish I could give it a second bun for the title. |
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The common Roomba roams with ease,
But stairs present a great unease.
It turns away from every flight,
Unable to ascend the height. |
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The Aardvac solves this problem well,
With clever legs that climb and quell.
It has the form of aardvark small,
It scales the stairs and cleans them all. |
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Its motorised smart legs engage
To hold its balance on each stage.
The snout in motion glides with grace,
Across the steps to clean the space. |
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All gathered dirt it stores inside,
Its belly keeps the grime with pride.
When power starts to fade away,
it tries to charge without delay. |
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Your periphery it roves
Around the edges, in the grooves.
It sucks the dirt from floor and board,
Where common Roombas have ignored. |
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The deluxe Aardvac has a treat,
A furry back that's soft and sweet.
It doubles as a footrest grand,
Instead of storage, close at hand. |
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Bravo - reminds me of my favourite poem which I have been known to recite at certain gatherings "the common cormorant or shag, lays eggs inside of paper bags....
[there's more but I won't post here] |
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Sounds like Aardvark with a heavy Boston accent. |
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"[...] and steal the bags to hold the crumbs." [+] |
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It should start from the top of the stairs and draw inspiration from the slinky. Except, obviously, a furry slinky. This is more consonant with the aardvark in nature reaching down for ants, not up. |
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The true genius half-baker would have worked out a way to convert the potential energy from one riser into enough suck to clean one tread. I am not that genius. |
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Yes obviously the Aardvac would be quite heavy. Its front feet would contain a geared mechanism that runs a crank and bellows, so it puts its front feet on the next step down, and the crank opens and closes the bellows so that it alternately sucks through its nose and puffs filtered air out of its arse. When the legs are at the bottom of their travel and the heavy body is down at the level of the stair, the back legs come down the step and the front legs extend out and down to the next step down and the cycle continues. |
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When it gets to the bottom it attaches to a ski-lift-like-contraption that gives it a high-wire ride back up to the top of the stairs where the cycle starts again. |
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"When I get to the bottom I go back to the top of the slide and then I see you again!" |
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[pocmloc] is, apparently, that genius. |
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But does it look like a Pontiac Trans Sport? |
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