It's hard to break up with a girlfriend. Do you tell her you're not attracted to her? Use the old "It's not you, it's me" routine? Make up some other lame cliche of an excuse? You will feel guilty, no matter what you say.
Never again. With these specialized aerosol spray cans, you can make your house or apartment smell so yucky, your significant other will decide she doesn't want to spend the rest of her life with you, and *she* will voluntarily break up with *you*.
Some suggestions: - Body Odor - Cigarette Smoke - Old Person (a tasteful combination of rubber band-aids and slightly rotten fruits) - Unflushed Toilet - Dead Rodent - Smelly Dog
And so on.-- phundug, May 21 2003 50 ways to leave your lover - Gotta Go, Po http://www.whocutth.../archive/052301.htm [po, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004] Mood BO http://www.halfbakery.com/idea/Mood_20BOSituational scents [Shz, Oct 05 2004] What if you're living at *her* place?-- Cedar Park, May 21 2003 Mmmm - Pretty much halfbaked by yours truly. <link> A word of advice: Don’t use aerosol for anything. It seems many here can’t stand the stuff.-- Shz, May 21 2003 Here's a sure thing: Leave your skid marks in her thong.-- FloridaManatee, May 21 2003 po: to scan properly, that should be: "Get a new beau, po"-- DrCurry, May 21 2003 BTW, Po's list is mistaken. It takes the original 5 and adds a further 40, for a total of 45 ways to leave your lover.
Doesn't quite have the same ring to it.-- FloridaManatee, May 21 2003 Instead of spending money on sprays, why don't you and your dog (or neighbor's dog) not bathe for awhile, invite some old people that smoke over, not flush the toilet, and drop a couple of dead rats around your abode.-- goober, May 21 2003 Just noticed "hire a hit man, Rip Van" is in there twice.-- lintkeeper2, May 21 2003 Have some hard boiled eggs, hot pork rinds, linguica and a warm Michelob. Close windows.-- thumbwax, May 21 2003 Sounds like a weekend in South Carolina, thumb.-- goober, May 21 2003 [Flo] you are quite right but I didn't write the flipping thing. we will just have to make up another 5 and Curry's "Get a new Beau, po" is apt.
//Leave your skid marks in her thong.// quite right - [Flo] ewww.-- po, May 21 2003 We don't need no stinkin' break-up spray.-- oatcake, May 21 2003 Crack open a durian fruit. Don't open the windows.-- Cedar Park, May 21 2003 All girls I meet use breakup spray. Unfortunately, it's mace.-- Amos Kito, May 21 2003 random, halfbakery