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Sport: Urban
Butt-fu   (+3, -3)  [vote for, against]
The sole object is to fight with your butt and push them out of the arena

As a proud American, we ain't that competant at real sports other than competitive eating and running to hometown buffets for the days meal of ribs, unidentifiable teriyaki chicken, and colored, carbonated sugar water.

Since obesity, as i call it the "anti-anoroxic" obession, is more accepted in america as being normal and near being called a disability due to us actually having fat genes, we have created a sport that is less rough than sumo, less sweaty than sex, and more fun because we probably can't feel it (hey....i found a penny!)

So the rules of BUtt Fu, created in vietnam by me in 2002 but today is to be revealed to the world, is to push the oponent out of the ring with your butt and your butt only. No use of hands, tead, or torso allowed.

and definitely.....their are little small liters by your behinds to make sure you don't violate the rules.

Anyways the rules are simple. Use glutamus maximus to push other glutamus maxiumus out of the ring. that simple.

But, as the master, i suggest the following moves:

flying butt punch-its where you squatt and hit them in the butt in mid-air.

ham-push: doing the seventies move where you bounch your butt on their and make them fall.

the possibilities are endless.

An activity that can be shared with the whole family...and future generations (oooh...i found another penny!)

Note: Satired....(new word?) ......also to make it easier. otherwise....must eat packaged air..(the next craze)

Think sumo, except everything to fight with is just the butt..... must i make more synonyms about the behind?

thanks for the comments. i love writing here!!
-- compatta, May 30 2006

//As a proud American, we ain't that competant at real sports other than competitive eating//

lol! Where do I start with that sentence?!
-- kuupuuluu, May 30 2006


//and definitely.....their are little small liters by your behinds to make sure you don't violate the rules.//
Umm...sorry, that bit threw me...what?
-- fridge duck, May 30 2006


I've played this game at college. You're also out if you fall over or fail to keep your hands locked behind your knees. Its been played at the college I go to since well before 2002. Baked, but not widely.
-- sninctown, May 30 2006


[Phlish] litterary? Of or having to do with litter?
-- jellydoughnut, May 31 2006


my dog does this...
-- bleh, May 31 2006


/The sole object is to fight with your butt and push them out of the arena/

...

/the rules of BUtt Fu ... is to push the oponent out of the ring with your butt and your butt only./

...

/Anyways the rules are simple. Use glutamus maximus to push other glutamus maxiumus out of the ring. that simple./

I'm sorry, I'm still not getting it.
-- Texticle, Jun 01 2006


[compatta].

You live here. Go ahead. You feel the brutally heavy weight coming down on your shoulders every farkin' day. If you're not (smart) upper class, it's a difficult road. No one tells you the pitfalls, & all the advertisements ask you to jump right ahead.

Perhaps you do live here, then I don't understand this. Perhaps, I do. a fish until my slow mind can be enlightened.
-- Zimmy, Jun 01 2006


What [Texticle] said.

//the possibilities are endless.//

I don't get that either.

Hey, I'm an American, and I biked 13 miles today!
-- DesertFox, Jun 01 2006


Another rule: Butts should be clean and inside clothing.

A skinny bloke with a shit covered, naked and hairy arse, might win by default.
-- Ling, Jun 01 2006


Toi Khoung hiue tieng cua nuoui nam. I've been told that the value of life in Viet Nam is much less than what we are used to here in fat america. (sorry for my horrid accent, I could never pronounce Vietnamese properly, (though I tried - it usually got me in trouble or laughed at.))

I've also been told that the gung fu of the fighting arts in Viet Nam is dangerous. Why the need for this?

perhaps you & the Brits will have a good laugh at my failure to understand good satire?
-- Zimmy, Jun 01 2006


[+] For being brave enough to post that.
-- leif980, Jun 01 2006


I like "anoroxic" the best. Clearly it is some sort of chemical compound that prevents people from roxoring your boxors.

Also, cf the "Flying Butt Pliers" from Ren & Stimpy, way back when.
-- calum, Jun 01 2006


crazy and weird... lots of typos... most of the first part of this is a rant... but I'm witholding an m-f-d just because I think the Reality TV version of this would play well. Butt-fu with celebrities! What a show.
-- zigness, Jun 04 2006



random, halfbakery