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Business: Funeral
Deathbed top secret read in   (+4)  [vote for, against]
For money

Moments before you expire, a civil servant, cleared to top secret plus codeword level, appears and divulges a juicy state secret to you.

Obviously, you've chosen from a menu of possible areas of interest in return for your fee. What's more, the fee covers medical professionals and lawyers to be on hand to ensure there's no chance of any leakage.

You can then pop off with a smirk on your face.
-- DenholmRicshaw, Sep 24 2019

It would be so disappointing if the juicy secret was something you already knew
-- hippo, Sep 24 2019


//so disappointing if the juicy secret was something you already knew//

Would it? Just say "oh I know that" and spend your remaining minutes observing the quiet panic.
-- bs0u0155, Sep 24 2019


Also, what if you are already a civil servant with a high level security clearance?
-- hippo, Sep 24 2019


I think this would work well the other way around. On your deathbed, with your beloved family gathered around you, just whisper "I killed them all, you know. So much blood - so very much blo..."
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 24 2019


“Whatever you do, never dig up the patio...”
-- hippo, Sep 24 2019


What if the secret is "Due to a mix-up in hospital when you were a newborn baby, you are in fact the rightful heir to the throne of <insert name of country> ...

Rather a bitter pill to swallow.

// with your beloved family gathered around you, //

At least that's not something you'll ever have to worry about, [MB]. From what we've had the misfortune to observe of your family, the nearest analogy would be a pack of hungry jackals following an injured zebra foal.
-- 8th of 7, Sep 24 2019


"Pop off" means to die right? I hope that means to die and not something else.
-- doctorremulac3, Sep 25 2019


Yay! I was useful!
-- pertinax, Sep 25 2019


// a pack of hungry jackals following an injured zebra foal// Pshaw. Buchanans are never hungry.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 25 2019


It's an allegory ... you know what we mean, cold blooded, scaly skin, huge teeth, relative of crocodiles and cayman...
-- 8th of 7, Sep 25 2019



random, halfbakery