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Sport: Tennis
Elevennis   (+11, -3)  [vote for, against]
Tennis, plus a bit.

There's no getting away from the fact that the taller you are, the easier tennis becomes, because the net obscures less of the opposite side of the court as your point of trajectory gets higher.

Elevennis would differ from tennis in that the net would be motorised, and change height between shots. Using something akin to the hawkeye technology currently seen on the pro tennis circuit, the net would shoot a couple of inches higher each time the taller player played their serve or shot. It would zip down again when the shorter guy hit back.

Tennis is great, but elevennis (while not intended to replace tennis) would be a fantastic development. Not only would it improve parity between such unlikely elevenis partners as Robert Wadlow and Vo Hai Dao, but would also lead to McEnroesque tantrums when, inevitably, the net went a bit wonky and shot up by a couple of inches at exactly the wrong moment, probably on match point. How wonderful!
-- Fishrat, Jul 03 2005

have a bun just for the image of Wadlow and anyone playing together as a doubles team.

High fiv... nevermind.
-- ato_de, Jul 03 2005


Alternatively, make the two sides of the court height adjustable. That way the court could be set up so that each players eyes were at the same level, but you wouldn't have the added confusion of a moving net.

On second thoughts, let's go with the moving net.
-- wagster, Jul 03 2005


I also like the idea of a virtual/projected net which which starts out as a flat line, but assumes a waveform as soon as the player grunts. Louder they grunt, bigger the wave, worse chance of getting the ball over the net.
-- Fishrat, Jul 03 2005


Nice name. Could dozennis have a spinning court to have another element of diffuculty added?
-- The Acrimonious Obfuscator, Jul 03 2005


I distrust the moving net with the automatic cameras, artificialintelligence,height gauging etc. It is only a matter of time before it wraps itself around someones throat.

Why not use tennis racquets with extralong handles? With 3 or 4 foot handles, even the dwarfiest of players can get that coveted high trajectory. I would suggest that the game as played with these giant racquets be called Twelvis, but you really would need the sideburns and a silver lamee jumpsuit to play it right.
-- bungston, Jul 04 2005


Yeah, 'cause Nineniss with it's lowering courts really sucked.
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Jul 04 2005


No, no! For elevennis you'd take out the regular net, and put it and another vertically at each side of the court. This would leave a vertical space to shoot through, and the nets would somewhat resemble the number 11. They'd be more like 1_1, though.

Shorter people would have nothing to have to see over, and shorter-legged people wouldn't have to run from side to side as much. Tactics could involve putting evil spins on the ball to get the opponent into the corners behind the net.

Replace the horizontal net with a couple of white lines that the ball must land past. Or make a rule change to prevent low, dribbly shots--perhaps a rule that any ball swung at like a golf ball is not required to touch the court provided it travels at groin level.
-- baconbrain, Jul 04 2005


Why don't you just make tennis better and make tennis be the top..number...and make that a little better?
...this is elevennis.
-- Minimal, Jul 05 2005


I seriously thought that elevennis had something to do with elbows... like Elbow Tennis or Tennis Elbow... until I read the description that is.
-- Kozi4361, Jul 05 2005



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