It has been noted that those who use prosthetic lower limbs have a certain advantage when it comes to, for example, queueing. More often than not, a pained expression and constant shifting of weight onto a walking stick will be enough to make many gatekeepers - however seemingly fearsome - so uneasy at the obvious presence of disability to allow a little delicate queue-jumping to occur; and even better, other able-bodied queuers raise no objection to such proceedings.
Thus BorgCo have designed and manufactured a superbly engineered fake artificial leg. This rigid casing clips neatly and comfortably over a real, normal functional leg, and is cunningly coloured and textured to look not quite lifelike, with a prominent metal "hinge" at the ankle.
Use of a small, soft plastic block inside the heel of the corresponding shoe produces a convincing slight limp and awkwardness when walking, adding to the authenticity of the appearance.
If the "leg" is tapped with the optional complementary walking stick (available for a modest extra charge) a distinctive hollow, knocking sound is emitted - by the stick. But it sounds like it comes from the leg, of course.-- 8th of 7, Sep 27 2020 For you, is there a head to go with it? One that contains an actual brain instead a sponge that's been dipped in a bowl of bat guano would be useful. [+] For the idea that the bat we sent probably wrote for you.-- xenzag, Sep 27 2020 Cheaper option: just remove your leg. No on-going maintenance, lighter and easier to transport (the non- existent leg, that is; the rest of the person, not so much...).-- neutrinos_shadow, Sep 27 2020 // a special place in Hell reserved for people who fake a disability for pity’s sake. //
Quite right, that's contemptible, despicable and disgusting.
What about the ones who do it from simple selfishness, laziness and arrogance, though ? That's all right, shirley ?-- 8th of 7, Sep 28 2020 Further modification I just thought of: once the artificial artificial leg is clamped on tight, it doesn't come off. Ever.-- neutrinos_shadow, Sep 28 2020 We are familiar with "Jake the Peg", but our speciality is Barbershop ... as you would expect, we're superb at close-harmony singing ...
// they’re queued up for your tour of Gettysburg. //
They don't exactly have a choice; the shackles and chains keep them in line quite nicely. We won't make that mistake again, after the last lot ran away ...-- 8th of 7, Sep 28 2020 <Massive Collective throat-clearing/>
<Street vendor>
"Earplugs ... earplugs ... only fifty dollars a pair ... earplugs ... cotton wool ... get your earplugs here ... last chance to buy ... earplugs ..."
</Street vendor>-- 8th of 7, Sep 28 2020 Your insomnia is not our problem, [kdf]-- 8th of 7, Sep 28 2020 random, halfbakery