Fashion: Protection: Environmental
Hat Braces   (+6, -1)  [vote for, against]
keep your hat on!

In the UK, braces are what we call those elasticated bands, which clip or button unto a pair of trousers at the front and back, then extend over the shoulders, and in so doing prevent the trousers from descending unexpectedly.

Hat Braces are simply a set of modified braces which connect the trousers to the rim of one's hat, again at the front and back. With Hat Braces in place, no hat will ever blow away again on a windy day.

Customised reinforcing frame to prevent hat shape distortion available as an optional extra.
-- xenzag, Nov 28 2015

What if the wind is sufficiently strong that hat blows away with you still attached ? Tell us that, eh, Mr Clever ?
-- 8th of 7, Nov 28 2015


This is entirely laudable. [+]
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 28 2015


[+] //rim// sp. "headband"
-- FlyingToaster, Nov 28 2015


In the USA, the description of braces appears to apply to something known as "suspenders".
-- Vernon, Nov 28 2015


Just the bottom half though, the top half is called srednepsus.
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Nov 28 2015


In the Ozarks, there's a description of someone so skinny that he had to fasten his suspenders to his hat. No one lately, of course.
-- baconbrain, Nov 28 2015


Suspenders, or braces, are invisible to the naked eye, mostly, and that is their beauty. Unless the person wishes for them to show, they stay hidden behind a vest or top coat. So yours would travel up to the hat and that part would be there for all to see. I think that might take away from the point of wearing them. I dunno.
-- blissmiss, Nov 28 2015


I feel like these should connect at the center point of the torso, such that the front strap runs along the wearer's nose.

It's an important distinction. Trouser braces use shoulder straps to hold trousers up, but as the hat needs to be held down, a single strap front and back is sufficient.
-- tatterdemalion, Nov 28 2015


Head turning may be difficult while wearing Hat Braces. Perhaps what is needed is a swashplate, mounted at neck height and disguised as a ruff, with a bearing race to transmit the tension through the rotary coupling.
-- mitxela, Nov 28 2015


^ Excellent addition, [mit].
-- 8th of 7, Nov 28 2015


How about if we just make the hat very heavy? So very heavy that putting it on gives the wearer such a headache that they decide to stay home out of the wind.

[blissmiss], I wear suspenders, and I seldom keep them covered up. But then, I live in the Ozarks.
-- baconbrain, Nov 28 2015


In the UK, only women wear suspenders to keep up their stockings and to torture men with the occasional glimpse.
-- xenzag, Nov 28 2015


Yes, worrying thought to imagine [baconbrain] wearing stockings and suspenders and not much else...
-- pocmloc, Nov 28 2015


<Colonel Kurtz>

"The horror ... the horror ..."

</Colonel Kurtz>
-- 8th of 7, Nov 28 2015


Hey, now!
-- baconbrain, Nov 28 2015


You're so brazen, [baconbrain]. And hey, I live about 50 miles from the Ozarks so we are kin. Sort of.
-- blissmiss, Nov 29 2015



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