Waking up to the alarm clock is no problem for me. It's finding sufficient motivation to overpower the intertia keeping me in bed that gives me trouble. Enter Incresaingly Uncomfortable Nightgown. This line of fashionable, flowy nighties is made of a soft cotton (or flannel, depending on your climatological needs) that's perfectly cozy -- until the alarm goes off.
As soon as you shut off the included (but not attached)alarm clock, it sends a signal to tiny wireless receptors in the nightgown. The gown's microcircuitry goes to work, activating tiny devices in the edges of the gown that gradually gather up the excess fabric on the hem and ends of the sleeves until they're not quite digging in, but are definitely pressing directly on the skin. Other (well-insulated) circuits in the body of the gown are heating the fabric up just enough to encourage a little bit of sweating and make the fabric clingy.
As you lie there, your develop no sudden desire to get up and go to work. You do, however, develop a sudden desire to get this damn nightgown off. The hem and sleeves are stretchy enough that removing the nighgown will be a little more inconvenient than usual, but not massively difficult. Once you've already sat up and gotten undressed, you're awake enough that it would be more effort to try and flop back into bed. Touching the armpits of the nightgown together resets the mechanism, and after a quick wash (gentle cycle only!) your Increasingly Uncomfortable Nightgown is comfortable once more.-- Tabbyclaw, Jul 16 2004 Extreme version http://www.halfbake...c_20blanket_20alarm [angel, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 17 2004] You could build it into the bed sheet for us guys, with little electric shocks that slowly get stronger, or you could set it to one big electric shock 5 minutes after the alarm, that should get you out of bed PDQ-- scubadooper, Jul 16 2004 Or one whose increasing discomfort prompts your guest to remove it while the night is yet young.-- bristolz, Jul 16 2004 what [bristolz] said.-- xclamp, Jul 16 2004 what [q2cannonfodder] said-- scubadooper, Jul 16 2004 what they all said-- luecke, Jul 16 2004 Make the gown burst into flames for a quicker waker upper.-- mailtosalonga, Jul 16 2004 don't nighties do this quite naturally anyway?-- po, Jul 16 2004 // Once you've already sat up and gotten undressed // The wearer might become very adept at undressing without sitting up, thus defeating the aim.-- benjamin, Jul 17 2004 those nighties which tie up from the wrist behind your back are the devil to get out of.-- po, Jul 17 2004 I'd rather sleep.-- DesertFox, Jul 17 2004 My wife knows better than to get undressed where I can see or touch her in the morning. This product would only damage the world population control effort by adding to the 5 kids she has already (mostly by accident) had.
Bone (er) but nice try.-- James Newton, Jul 17 2004 Good idea.Could be adapted to be quite kinky.(help's one to get up in the morning).Not that I have a problem with that.References supplied.-- python, Jul 17 2004 YOu could combine this with a bed that just dumps you out of bed in the morning. Maybe I should post this as a new idea.-- Imathinker, Jul 18 2004 Nah, I'd just fall back asleep lying comfortably on the floor.-- Pericles, Jul 18 2004 Me too. Oh, I might stir for a moment but, once comfortable, I'd be out.-- bristolz, Jul 18 2004 At this season, where I live, it's my increasingly uncomfortable body that wakes me up, driven by daylight and weather.When I finally wake up, after a quick wash (gentle cycle only!) my increasingly uncomfortable body is confortable once again.-- shibolim, Jul 20 2004 read the title and thought the idea was to get women out of them more quickly, bummer.-- dungbeetle, Jul 20 2004 get up. smash "snooze" button. rip off nightgown. Climb back into bed, naked, and enjoy another 8.75 minutes of blissful procrastination. (assuming it takes 15 seconds to complete said tasks)-- Freefall, Jul 21 2004 random, halfbakery