Well, the easiest way to get them pesky aliens to go somewhere else is to bore them into submission.

The kit includes a fake rectum which contains - an algebra book, "Hoover for 1932" pennants, Mountaineering in Lincolnshire guide books, any speech by John Major, EU homologation guides etc...
-- not_morrison_rm, Oct 20 2018

Erm, when was the last time aliens were spotted mountaineering in Lincolnshire?

The only alleged "sighting" was Sturton in a nightdress after his inadvisable late supper of those "special" mushrooms. I tole him, I did...but did he listen?
-- not_morrison_rm, Oct 20 2018


//when was the last time aliens were spotted mountaineering in Lincolnshire? // Ah, you have failed to see the wood for the trees here. The mountains in Lincolnshire *are* aliens.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 20 2018


I read the title as Kilt to deter alien abductions and wondered if the Scots were on to something.
Anyone know if there are fewer Scottish abduction claims than average?
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Oct 20 2018


Aliens wouldn't go there, they've seen Trainspotting.
-- not_morrison_rm, Oct 20 2018



random, halfbakery