Carefully, timidly, I stepped onto what appeared to be a patch of harmless lawn, my hands clasped tightly over my eyes, feeling carefully with the bare sole of my foot.

I was uncertain whether I had found one, but I had to be certain... I couldn't just leave it there for some poor, unsuspecting soul to trip upon. By now I was quite certain I had found what I was seeking.

I knelt to the grass and unsheathed my bayonet, sliding it into the soft earth beneath the grass and levering the blade gently upward. There was something large and reasonably soft just under the grass. I lifted a little harder and caught a peek of a striped jersey. Now I simply had to identify the country of origin and the type and I was home and hosed.

Working quickly, I unearthed the mime, a post-WWII Bip, French in origin, from the Marcel Mangel School. It began to sit up so I rapped it across the head with a police baton and watched as its eyes rolled back in its head.

Uncertain whether it was awake and simply pretending to be unconscious, I motioned my colleague to take the other end as we lifted it bodily into a waiting glass tank, filled with poisoned water of unusual clarity.

Quickly, we put a heavy lid on the tank and sat on it.

The mime erupted into motion, struggling against the glass for a long time before apparently running out of air. We waited another fifteen minutes, to be certain. Tricky buggers, these French mimes.
-- infidel, May 14 2011

<link>

Hobart's "Funnies"; beating mimes to death with heavy chains since 1944.

[+]
-- 8th of 7, May 14 2011


You're digging up buried, but un-dead, mimes?

Do you not realize how difficult it's going to be to kill a zombie- mime meme?
-- lurch, May 15 2011


Why does the water have to be poisoned? Shirley the resulting solution of black-and-white makeup is equally lethal.
-- DrWorm, May 15 2011


Drowning, poison and makeup... to be sure, to be sure, to be sure.
-- infidel, May 15 2011


Are we now to expect Mimesweeper to be bundled with Wndows 8 ?
-- 8th of 7, May 17 2011


No, it'll be on the Windows phone by Nokia - gesture-controlled. Logo will be Elop trying to get out of a clear Microsoft contract.
-- lurch, May 17 2011


Once drowned, where on land do you propose to dispose of them?
-- BunsenHoneydew, May 17 2011


Invisible glass boxes should suffice.
-- RayfordSteele, May 17 2011


Perhaps they could be dried, then put outdoors when a strong wind is expected, so they blow around like tumbleweed…
-- 8th of 7, May 17 2011


Stitch them together and use them as sails on mock pirate ships. They can wave endearingly as mock cannonballs pass through them.
-- infidel, May 17 2011


Who or what, is a Jasper Fforde? Is it like a Jasper Carrot?
-- infidel, May 18 2011


A children's author, I take it?
-- infidel, May 18 2011



random, halfbakery