Food: Vending Machine
One Pound Omelette   (+10, -1)  [vote for, against]

Insert a coin into the vending machine. In turn,a five star pianist will whip you up a omelette by thrashing the keys and pedals of a grand piano whilst tossing assortments of mushrooms, cheese and the like under the piano's hood.

Concealed behind the machine, the piano churns with such a turbulent pianistic force of the Hammerklavier that the internal beaters frenziedly whip the mix into a omelette.The faster the pianist plays the hotter the mixing compartment becomes.

After a few minutes the keys wind down.The finale kicks into place.

The omelette now beaten and cooked is delivered through the vending machine's chute.
-- skinflaps, Apr 02 2006

Eaten with chopsticks?
-- Dub, Apr 02 2006

I'll Bach (sorry) anything that makes an omelette [+] Would also like to see what would happen if a minimalist piece was played.... contemplates lake of gently bubbling egg yellow with a single perfect mushroom slice delicately balanced on one corner like a little edible ballerina.... drifts off into blissful, omelette music inspired oblivion.
-- xenzag, Apr 02 2006

..and Chopin.
-- skinflaps, Apr 02 2006

this pianist, does he sit behind a glass window like the laughing poiceman?
-- po, Apr 02 2006

Aye. Say a pianist in the room will counter that awful sucking sound of soda drinking, food processor, commode flush, draining, and gustation; and, leave you listening to only the door chime, chairs in motion, rattle of utensils, and occasional laugh??

"Sounds" to me like this is just the ticket.
-- reensure, Apr 02 2006

I love the idea but there's no way this would only cost a pound.
-- Mr Phase, Apr 02 2006

A very eggs-cellent idea mr flaps.
-- DrBob, Apr 03 2006

can we include a guitar solo by Eric Cracktem?
-- Dub, Apr 03 2006

//no way this would only cost a pound.//

maybe that's the weight :)
-- skinflaps, Apr 03 2006

Did you say "pianist", or was that a typo while you were taking dictation?
-- neuro, Apr 04 2006

And to follow, a Cakewalk for dessert.
-- egbert, Apr 04 2006

[xenxag]: Further proof that minimalism and E. coli go hand-in-hand.
-- shapu, Apr 04 2006

random, halfbakery