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Product: Umbrella: Wind
Rubberella   (+6, -1)  [vote for, against]

Rubberella is an umbrella that has its waterproof panels made from sheets of thin rubber. Now when there is a strong wind that gets underneath the canopy, the panels will simply balloon outwards like a bubble and the umbrella won't blow inside out. Any tears can be easily rectified using a bicycle puncture repair kit.
-- xenzag, Dec 14 2018

// balloon outwards like a bubble and the umbrella won't blow inside out. //

It will, because the surface area and hence the applied pressure will be at least the same as a fabric umbrella; in reality slightly higher, as rubber is impervious, whereas fabric is slightly porous, allowing air through - the water doesn't penetrate because of the fine weave and surface tension effects.

<contemplates mental image of [xen] being reluctantly wafted high over the rooftops like a sort of snarling, obsessive mirror-universe Mary Poppins/>

<snigger/>

[+]
-- 8th of 7, Dec 14 2018


In fact, the Goodyear company did, for some time, manufacture rubber umbrellas. The Fox Umbrella Company was highly put out by this, and started a rumour that rubber umbrellas were more likely to be struck by lightning than silk ones.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Dec 14 2018


Yes, but there's a vaccine against rubberella now ... isn't there ?
-- 8th of 7, Dec 14 2018


... new look for Jane Fonda.
-- FlyingToaster, Dec 14 2018


I think she may be getting past the age when she can pull off that kind of outfit.. she might have problems putting it on too.
-- Skewed, Dec 14 2018


Baby oil ?
-- 8th of 7, Dec 14 2018


Too expensive. Do you know how many babies you have to press to get a pint of it?
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Dec 15 2018


To the nearest half-dozen, yes. Of course the yield varies from year to year, depending on the quality of the crop, but it's possible to give a sufficiently accurate estimate for commercial purposes.
-- 8th of 7, Dec 15 2018


Juice may be the outcome of pressing, but is oil not obtained as a consequence of a fractional distillation process?
-- xenzag, Dec 15 2018


//rubber umbrellas were more likely to be struck by lightning//

I thought this was shown to be down to the brand of flenting wax in use?
-- Wrongfellow, Dec 15 2018


Indeed; it's a well-known and proven fact that if you use any product other than Rentisham's, the gods will smite you down for your sacreligious arrogance.

// fractional distillation //

In this case, by steam distillation of the juice, as with other essential oils. First you crush 'em, then you boil 'em.
-- 8th of 7, Dec 15 2018


I want one. A big pink one. Resembling a giant bubble gum bubble when inflated. Whhooooo-hooooo!!!
-- blissmiss, Dec 15 2018


What, a baby??
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Dec 15 2018


<phones child services about [bliss]'s plans to inflate a baby until it resembles a giant pink bubble gum bubble/>
-- Skewed, Dec 15 2018


<wonders if inflation will improve juice yields over the current process/>
-- 8th of 7, Dec 15 2018


Isn't Walmart selling a GreatValue version of Rentisham's now? It says clearly on the label "compare to Rentisham's brand flenting wax"
-- 21 Quest, Dec 15 2018


Nothing compares to Rentisham's ...
-- 8th of 7, Dec 15 2018


The thing is, Rentisham's has never been available in the States in any form. The only time it has ever been allowed to be exported was in connection with the Apollo program, where limited quantities were made available to NASA for a very specific application. Consequently, Americans cannot be acquainted with Rentisham's, leaving them open to all kinds of pale imitations.

Boffo did once start a campaign to get the term "flenting wax" legally defined in a way which would reflect the high standards of the Rentisham product, and would preclude imitators* from so naming their dubious offerings. He was partly successful, inasmuch as there was consensus amongst European nations and the UK. However, the definition has no legal standing in the US, nor (due to difficulties in pronunciation) in Japan.

(*In fact, Fopp's rival product was also embraced by the definition - this was a rare instance of Boffo's generosity towards Rentisham's chief competitor. In addition, Boffo knew that a healthy market depends on rivalry.)
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Dec 15 2018


"a healthy market depends on rivalry"

and a healthy income comes from a monopoly or a cartel

Oddly enough, Hasbro has the sole rights to Monopoly, which is a monopoly. It's all too recursive.
-- not_morrison_rm, Dec 16 2018



random, halfbakery