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Product: Alarm Clock: Timing
The Pit and the Pendulum Egg Timer   (+10, -2)  [vote for, against]
dastardly timing

The Pit and the Pendulum (for those who don't know) is a dastardly tale by Edgar Allan Poe, which features a device of particular terror to those who become its victims.

Its operation consists of the motion of a curved blade on the end of a swinging pendulum, whose continuous progress backwards and forwards is also accompanied by a relentless gradual descent towards the neck of its intended victim.

The Pit and the Pendulum Egg Timer is a scale model replica of its infamous namesake, complete with twitching victim.

A simple dial sets the time of descent of the blade, calibrated from one minute to a full hour. When the blade reaches the neck of its victim (think barbie-doll sized figure) a blood curdling scream is released, chosen at random from a prerecorded selection. This grows in intensity the longer it is ignored.

With the figure removed, and another simple modification, The Pit and the Pendulum Egg Timer can also be used to automatically dice carrots, celery, tomatoes and other vegetables.
-- xenzag, Mar 04 2011

Better for the device to be full size, and the user to lie beneath it? Your egg is ready when you feel the first brush of the blade.
-- pocmloc, Mar 04 2011


Would it not be possible to arrange for the blade to "decapitate" the egg at the exact moment of perfect cookedness, thus fulfilling two necessary functions ?
-- 8th of 7, Mar 04 2011


Simple modification got my vote. (Sorry, Edgar)
-- Zimmy, Mar 14 2011


//relentless gradual descent towards the neck of its intended victim//

It has been a while since I read any Poe, but I am sure the blade was positioned above the victim's midsection. Not the victim's neck.
-- MikeD, Mar 14 2011


HUMPTY!!!

oh humpty...
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, May 27 2012



random, halfbakery