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Food: Vegetarianism
Tofu Sex Aids   (+26, -23)  [vote for, against]
Discover the Wonders of Vegetarian Self Stimulation

Tofu has an organic quality resembling human flesh. I have heard girlfriends divulge its texture as that of the male member when cooked/warmed.

I envision a marketing push by blue chip Tofu Mulitnationals to promote their product in a range of edible sex aids - both for men and women.

The strap - on Tofunator with vibrating multispeed tip would be a hit with lesbian vegetarian extremists who despise 'meat' of both kinds.

Feral type men who often have trouble with penetration due to over-pierced willies can safely 'deforest the untouched valleys' of the silken Tofu vagina.

Also in this range is the 'Falafel-Fist' for the earth-conscious fetish environmentalist, the natural spray on pheromone for shy hippies - 'Chick-Pea Magnet' and of course the 'Lentilly Lace' vegan underwear range - gauranteed to show off those politically hursuit thighs.
-- benfrost, May 18 2001

Tofurniture http://www.halfbake...om/idea/Tofurniture
Soy Bean curd World domination! [benfrost, May 18 2001]

Meaty version? Grilly_20Willy_20Stress_20Sausage
Not intended for stimulation, though. [squeak, Jul 19 2007]

NO!
-- Susen, May 18 2001


[quote] I have heard girlfriends divulge its texture as that of the male member when cooked/warmed. [/quote]

I have not had the joy of experiencing a cooked male member. Do you have any recipes you could share?
-- freakysid, Jan 09 2002


sure
-- benfrost, Jan 09 2002


Errr... I won't pretend to be an expert on these things, but if my, er, "member" was the consistency of Tofu, I'd be constantly losing my "membership".
-- spaceman_spiff, Jan 18 2002


PeterSealy]: ". . . hung round very long." You're probably right. Likely to be some shrinkage when cooked.
-- bristolz, Jan 18 2002


Has anyone ever handled one of those hot banana fritters covered in batter? Blimey.
-- Helium, Jan 19 2002


OK, if you're reading this it's too late, but this should never have been read, or for that matter, dreamt up.
-- sven3012, Jan 20 2002


Eew!
-- energy guy, Jan 04 2005


I know some veganphiles that would endorse this, but I think [sven3012] was right. Save yourself now, while you can. Go on without me, it's only a tofu wound.
-- normzone, Jan 04 2005


I like that they when it's made from tofu it's a "sex Aid" as opposed to 'sex toy'. Does that mean in my soup tofu is a food aid?
-- ColonelMuffins, May 04 2007


I honestly can't think of a better use of tofu.
-- phundug, May 04 2007


Tofu implants?
-- skinflaps, May 04 2007


Tofu money.
-- ColonelMuffins, May 04 2007


A bun for //lesbian vegetarian extremists who despise 'meat' of both kinds//. [+]
-- nuclear hobo, May 04 2007


ditto [+]
-- lilsis, May 05 2007


this still comes up in conversation. and meals.
-- benfrost, Jul 18 2007


YES!

I want a full sized tofu lady. Then I could eat her.

MUH-AH-HA-HA-HA!!

rubs flippers and dives trough the surface of ice
-- evilpenguin, Jul 18 2007


I once did sort of a meat version of this, v. early on in my HB career. It got boned to death, never understood why. (Linky - votes oblitorated in great crash).
-- squeak, Jul 19 2007


+1... for 'Falafel-Fist'.
-- tactik, Jul 21 2007



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