Culture: Amusement Park: Ride: Spinning
Unmerry-Go-Round   (+7)  [vote for, against]
Riding mechanical bulls while spinning in a circle.

Unlike a normal merry-go-round, this one would not feature cheery pink ponies for three year olds to ride. Nor will the soft playing music box be playing in the background. Nah, this ride needs multi-sized mechanical bulls at various speeds, each rated by color. 80's lead guitar music would be blaring out of the side speakers, and with each bull equipped with glowing red eyes, this would surely offer a glimmer of hope to any husband strolling the park with his wife and kids. The kids can still ride the pink ones (with a difficulty rating of 1), of course, with them being the most tame. But the husband may choose the fiery red (5) or charcoal black (4) bulls for a thrill. And free cowboy hats for the ones who could stay on the 4s and 5s bulls. Of course, these would also be spaced far enough apart so that if there happened to be an accident, there would be enough room to not get trampled on. These should be popular in Texas.
-- ghillie, Feb 04 2004

(?) Unmerry-Go-Round http://www.markryde...ngs/two/cleard.html
[Mark Ryden] [Letsbuildafort, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

[pashute, Jun 26 2013]

I'm feeling ill just picturing it....
-- normzone, Feb 04 2004

Yeah, maybe its a little too harsh for some... shall I add a (-1) skill calf for the rest of us? BTW, the ride doesn't speed along too fast, maybe just a bit faster than a regular merry-go-round.
-- ghillie, Feb 04 2004

Well, having trained a wild mustang from scratch, I'm not unwilling to work with the idea....but a real bull will come back and stomp on you after he throws you off, whereas a horse will keep going. Can I get a mustang option ?

Of course, I'd want to spend a month gaining it's trust first....My "wild mustang" never even bucked once when I finally rode him...I had him used to the idea.
-- normzone, Feb 04 2004

i liked the idea as is, but what really clinched the bun from me is the mental image i have of normzone with it. after day he would saunter into the park with his spurs jangling and his 10 gallon hat pulled down low over his eyes. the small children would all stop what they were doing and gaze at him as he made his way over to the untamed black bull. they say that every day he stood one step closer to it, in hopes that before too long the bull would come to trust and obey - finally allowing him to ride and tame the brutal leader of the unmerry-go-round...
-- luecke, Feb 04 2004

You pretty much got one, I took a cup of coffee, a flake of hay, and a book....sat on the hay in his corral and read. He had to approach me to get breakfast. In an hour I could touch most of his body.

Of course, we will not describe here the various abuses he subjected me to during the next couple of months. I won most of the battles through trickery, food, patience, and making him use his own strength against himself. It was a fascinating learning experience for both of us. His name was [Ford].
-- normzone, Feb 04 2004

Well done. You didn't even need lasers or 'splosions to earn my bun! - [+]
-- Letsbuildafort, Feb 04 2004

The goring of clowns? Even better! Can we add mimes?
-- ghillie, Feb 04 2004

Dear God. How bullish of you, UB. It's almost more than I can bear.
-- Eugene, Feb 05 2004

I really prefer driving a Mustang as opposed to riding one !
-- riskyrisk, Feb 05 2004

Perhaps I should add blowing steam from their noses...
-- ghillie, Feb 05 2004

Sink the mimes to the surrounding terrain (making them land-mimes)

The nastiest of the bulls should be at the outer most ring and that should be surrounded by a bowl shaped wall. Thrown riders would then get drawn down and under for the full trampling effect. See movie 'Strangers on a Train' for mood.
-- DadManWalking, Feb 05 2004

Well, how do you feel about Broncos, [risk]?
-- Letsbuildafort, Feb 05 2004

Mustangs? Broncos? Aren't they called calves, bulls, and cows? We're talking about evil bulls, not prancing ponies...
-- ghillie, Feb 05 2004

+ although I'm not sure my level of merriment on this go-round would be any less than on a traditional one.
-- Lacus Trasumenus, Feb 05 2004

Maybe multiple circular platforms with different speeds? The dark, evil bulls could be spinning at around mach 3...
-- ghillie, Feb 06 2004

Would the ride operator have a microphone screaming "Do you want to go faster?".... Yee haw!
-- renegademonk, Feb 06 2004

[renegademonk]: I still can't decide if the operator should be a fat hillbilly or dressed as Lucifer himself.
-- ghillie, Feb 07 2004

Victim? Should I move this to the public: evil category?
-- ghillie, Feb 07 2004

Sounds great. I want a ticket!
-- spacecadet, Feb 07 2004

Le churn.
-- methinksnot, May 08 2006

I'd vote for this anyhow, but I think it's extra-great that the little kids can sit on an easy bull and laugh at dad (or mum) getting repeatedly thrown from the bucking mustang up ahead. Quality!
-- imaginality, May 08 2006

Why wasn't this called a Torosel?
-- goober, Dec 24 2007

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