Fashion: Protection: Bulletproof
"You got me" vest   (+15, -3)  [vote for, against]
"That's going to leave a mark!"

Inspired by the "'Tis Just A Fleshwound' Bullet Proof Vest ", this fashionably tailored kevlar-and-ceramic leather jacket contains small dye packs in between the armor layers and the outer leather.

When the jacket is struck by a weapon, it bleeds enough of a stain to convince the television-addled attacker that he has struck a telling blow, and need attack no further, giving you an extra moment for defensive or offensive action.
-- normzone, Mar 13 2006

[bigsleep], chaff and flare clothing is a great idea, but I am concerned about the details.

Such as: Why are you being pursued by missiles in the first place?

Still, I'd like to own one, but I think you'd want to keep moving from the moment you activate it, and maybe end up in a swimming pool. And you'll lose a lot of friends, unless you clean up after yourself.
-- normzone, Mar 13 2006

A bullet proof vest with blood-packs in it? My we're going through the Mickey Blue Eyes references today. Hugh Grant was wearing one of these in that lovely scene where he was shot. Almost brings a tear to my eye.
-- hidden truths, Mar 13 2006

Alas, then, that makes this preheated, if not baked. I should have suspected as much.
-- normzone, Mar 14 2006

<Lazarus Long> "It never bothered me to waste a bullet on a corpse." </LL>
-- ato_de, Mar 14 2006

Ah, the notebooks of LL.
-- normzone, Mar 14 2006

I like this idea. It's like the other one's twin that everybody loves twice as much.
-- notmarkflynn, Mar 14 2006

There is no reason to limit this to blood. There should be appropriately sited pockets which expel steaming streamers of guts, spurts of bile, or even a tumbling gout of brains.

Also the "stain" might not be noticed by the addled. What is needed here is "Evil- Dead" caliber gushing.
-- bungston, Jul 07 2007

Prehaps, once "shot" you should lay down, then in the WWE's undertaker style sit up slowly and continue walking towards the attacker. He may believe you have turned into a zombie and run off. This would be especially effective if - you are in a shopping mall, an old shack on the outskirts of town or an abandoned gas station. Please note this method is Ineffective against headshots, or a chevy converted into a helipcoter rota blade death machine.
-- S-note, Jul 09 2007

That, then, makes two ideas that have spun off of this one that have not been developed and posted.

The "Chaff and Flares Vest", and the "Zombie Vest". Both scare me.
-- normzone, Jul 09 2007

random, halfbakery