a device which removes several pints of blood at night to make a person sleepy and then pumps them back in in the morning to give them additional energy.
#toomuchbloodatnight-- bob, Jun 08 2016 Plasmapheresis https://en.wikipedi...wiki/PlasmapheresisA possible starting point. [8th of 7, Jun 08 2016] I suppose you'd need the same sort of kit that they have at any blood bank. I'm picturing clean syringes to get it out, and some way of storing it anaerobically so that it doesn't clot. (For just the overnight, I wonder whether refrigeration would be necessary). Then you'd have one of those ugly tube-danglers you find in hospital to get the blood back in in the morning.
One small snag would be if you're not really a morning person anyway, and you have to wake yourself up sufficiently to connect to the bowser while in an anaemic state. To obviate which you'd need to sleep plugged in, with a timer to inhibit the backflow until its time. Unless you can rely on your twenty-four hour nursing staff.-- pertinax, Jun 08 2016 What about modifying a dialysis machine ?
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Or a plasmapharesis machine. They separate erythrocytes from plasma and return them to the donor. So, crossing over some of the pipework would store the erythrocytes and return the plasma (no change in blood volume) and the process could be reversed at a later time.
<link>-- 8th of 7, Jun 08 2016 Nice. I'm wondering what could be done to improve or clean your blood while it's outside your body. Could the machine clean all the bad cholesterol out, adjust the balance of minerals, and filter out any heavy metals or pollution? Could this also save you time by removing the need for breakfast? - all you'd need is for the blood that's pumped back into your body to have a few nutrients and a bit of caffeine added.-- hippo, Jun 08 2016 //removing the need for breakfast// you still have the psychological need to put stuff in your mouth. I was IV-fed for over a month in a hospital stay... sucking on ice and staying awake at 3 A.M. watching cooking shows. I wasn't starving - I actually gained 10 kilos in the first 2 weeks - but I wanted to chew on something so bad I'd wake up with my thumb in my mouth.
//clean all the bad cholesterol out// I donate platelets about every two weeks. If I forget to go low-fat for 48 hours prior to donating, I end up with problems: the fat globules in the blood are pretty much the same size as platelets, so the apheresis machine pulls out lipids. It also makes the process much slower.-- lurch, Jun 08 2016 [marked-for-deletion] widely known to exist, if you have ever cycled competitively. Of course there is some additional work done on the blood overnight. That's where the real testis...-- 4whom, Jun 08 2016 // improve or clean your blood while it's outside your body. //
That's dialysis ...
// Could the machine clean all the bad cholesterol out, adjust the balance of minerals, and filter out any heavy metals or pollution? //
Add in some chelation processes and a charcoal filter and it's possible ...-- 8th of 7, Jun 08 2016 Hire a vampire for the night, then squeeze his belly in the morning and drink your blood back up?-- blissmiss, Jun 09 2016 If you've been bitten by a vampire, you wouldn't wake up until after sunset the next day, shirley ?
// widely known to exist, if you have ever cycled competitively. //
Blood doping's a somewhat different thing ...-- 8th of 7, Jun 09 2016 If occurs to me that you could achieve the intended effect without the actual blood-letting.
What you need to do is wear a tight-fitting elastic body suit during the day - a wetsuit two sizes two small would probably work very nicely. Your body will quickly reduce its blood volume through increased peeing throughout the day. Then, when you take the suit off at night, you will experience the same effects as if you'd lost a couple of pints of blood.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 09 2016 // wear a tight-fitting elastic body suit during the day - a wetsuit two sizes two small would probably work very nicely //
We don't believe for a minute that you've been taken in by his feeble excuse. When are you going to face up to the harsh reality that your sibling is sick, deviant and perverted, with a wholly unhealthy obsession with sheet elastomers ?
No-one was fooled by his claim that the purple latex confection he sported on Burns Night was a "full-body bathing cap".-- 8th of 7, Jun 09 2016 I hesitate to call the intercalary a sibling. Yes, we probably have the same parents, but he and I have never really sibbled.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 09 2016 //Blood doping's a somewhat different thing ...// Of course it is, so is an oil change. The best way to lose a testicle on the circuit though, is to take out today's race blood and put yesterday's fresh (or recharged) blood back in...without leaving tracks. Of course when everyone is does it you eventually have to actually dope I mean.-- 4whom, Jun 10 2016 Reverse-cycle mosquitoes will be the way forward, as soon as we've worked out how to corral them.-- pertinax, Jun 13 2016 Graphene Buckeyballs ?-- 8th of 7, Jun 13 2016 No, it's just the way I'm standing.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 13 2016 random, halfbakery