Home: Kitchen: Garbage Disposal
ice cannon   (+10)  [vote for, against]
scraps begone

I live in the country, and garbage pickup is only once a week. This means that I have to carry table scraps some considerable distance from my house if I don't want raccoons and opossums and dogs and cats and armadillos rooting around in my trash cans.

Yes, I could kill them, but I don't. So what I really need is a way to shoot the scraps into the woods with a pneumatic cannon built into my house. The cannon would tilt a few degrees up and down and would be equipped with a scale to determine the weight of the scraps. Then I could land the scraps in approximately the same location in the woods.

Since the scraps would eventually stink up the cannon, an ice sabot or shell would be needed. This could be made with a mould in the freezer, or could be made with a purpose-built contraption.

Ideally, the shell could be made of a biodegradable material that would turn to compost with the rest of the scraps. Then it could be formed in the shape of a proper shell.

If the cannon were sufficiently adjustable, I could throw in a handful of acorns or other seeds to promote the growth of deciduous trees (I'm in pine tree country, and I get tired of the same thing all the time), or feed the birds or deer some sunflower seeds or corn.
-- nomocrow, Aug 15 2008

Damn, sounds like fun. What part of the country do you live in?

"ELEVATE TO 25 DEGREES - FIRE ONE!"

Myself, I freeze mine and take them scuba diving.
-- normzone, Aug 15 2008


Do they enjoy that? I hope you get them proper training first.

The scrap cannon could be built around freezing the scraps in a bullet-shaped mold. Fill it all the way up with any mix of scraps and water (and seeds-good idea), and the density is probably not going to vary much from shell to shell. The ice will serve as lube in the cannon tube, although some care should be taken to keep bones buried in the middle of the mold.

The icy-on-the-outside projectile wouldn't need a wrapper or sabot. But, in case you haven't twigged, it would be very close to Pykrete, the fiber-reinforced ice. You might want to be careful where you aim. [+]
-- baconbrain, Aug 15 2008


The problem with this idea is that you might hit animals munching on the previous round.
-- phoenix, Aug 16 2008


Sounds great, I can't see it catching on in the more metropolitan areas though - Sometimes I wish I lived in the country.
-- theleopard, Aug 16 2008


I used to fire all of my scraps down into a ravine when I lived in the toolies where racoons and bears were a problem. Worked great.
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Aug 16 2008


Compost. Please. Furthermore this is a gross abuse of NIMBY.
-- WcW, Aug 16 2008


RISEBY = "Rather in somebody else's back yard" ?

// The problem .... is that you might hit animals //

You have a strange idea of what constitutes a problem.
-- 8th of 7, Aug 17 2008


//hit animals munching on the previous round//

There's a giant gong in the woods suspended from the middle and parallel with the ground. Nothing can stay on it and it makes a fantastic noise when you hit it.

" ... and I told them that Queequag actually represented the Church as a way of steering Ishmael away from ...

"Excuse me, dear, let me just get rid of these scraps"

Fooomp!

... steering him away from the desire from actual gratification by sublimating it into a "healthy" relationship, rather than a genteel presentation of the the thing itself. Which is based on fundamentally misguided notions of the fallibility of

booooooooong!
-- nomocrow, Aug 18 2008




//If the cannon were sufficiently adjustable, I could throw in a handful of acorns or other seeds to promote the growth of deciduous trees //

I salute you, General Appleseed!
-- ldischler, Aug 18 2008



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