Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Anonymous Library Silencer

Is someone being too loud in the library? Tell them to shut up, anonymously.
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Whenever I spend time in the library, inevitably people start talking. Whether it's a whisper or a full group discussion, it's rather annoying -- especially because an area may be designated a "Quiet Study Area." How does one go about getting them to be quiet?? It's a little embarassing to go up and ask them to be quiet, plus then you're "that guy who's trying to study." I have come up with two options to solve the problem.

In the first, the studious person could go to the front desk (or to the bathroom even) and indicate in which part of the library the disturbance was taking place. Then, after a few minutes (so you can return to your seat and look inconspicuous again), a sign lights up that says "Please Be Quiet."

The second option simply has an omnidirectional microphone that detects sound levels in its vicinity. (There would be many mics throughout the library.) Whenever the sound level got above a set deciBel threshhold, a similar sign lights up, thus telling people to be quiet without embarassing anyone.

toomuchmike, Sep 21 2001

(?) Conan the Librarian  http://www.zooass.c...ver/macsounds.shtml
Baked - Mac plug in yells "Shaad App" when noise level passes preset threshold. Best installed surreptitiously on machines belonging to paranoid computer neophytes. [lsenater, Sep 21 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(?) Anti-Noise Generators http://www.quietflo...ise/anti-noise.html
Instead, drop a couple of these in and let eveybody scream their heads off... [lsenater, Sep 21 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

[link]






       This would also be nice for the symphony. The only thing more annoying than people making noise during the music is the guy who stands up to tell them to be quiet.   

       Some libraries have talking and no-talking rooms, and this seems to solve the problem rather well too.
futurebird, Sep 21 2001
  

       Some people would try to get the sign to light up. You need something more, something between a sign and a giant anvil. How about an automatic crossbow that fires a toilet plunger onto the noisy person's face?
mrthingy, Sep 22 2001
  

       Duh, obviously you hook it up to a really big loudspeaker. And a siren.
pottedstu, Sep 23 2001
  

       i think you have forgotten how to simply ask for what you want. just say: "Can you please be quiet, this is a public place!" it works for me, I just say it so everyone can hear.
samm, Oct 31 2001
  

       As a long-suffering librarian I can assure you that "Can you please be quiet" will do *nothing* to lessen the noise, at least not in the case of truculent Further Education students. We find that menacing glares work best - something we librarians pride ourselves on.   

       During our many discussions on how best to deal with this situation, a recurring suggestion is the arming of library staff with baseball bats.....
salachair, Oct 31 2001
  

       Most ideas are looking weird. What about a kind of farting sound near to the chatters perhaps some smell too... disgusting noise makers are treated more disgusting then.....
Madmartigan, Nov 13 2001
  
      
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