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Ante-Meridial Freshness Index

 Quantitative measure of well-groomedness and preparation for the day
  (+1)
(+1) 		  [vote for,
against]

Have you ever woken at 07:45, realized you had to be out the door at 08:00, and wondered with a feeling of disquiet which steps of your morning routine would have to be elided?

Wonder no more.

The AMFI is a metric, tailored to your individual preferences, that assigns each day-preparation procedure an ordered pair whose elements are (freshness increment, time required).

Freshness units are defined however you choose; I prefer to think of them as a quantification of the degree to which I resemble an actor in a Mentos commercial when I arrive at work.

Examples:

MakeAndDrinkCoffee -> (+50, 15.0 min)
ClipToenails -> (+10, 5.0 min)
Shave -> (+25, 15.0 min)

Of course, certain steps are mutually exclusive or redundant with respect to others; one could capture this by entering, say,

Shower -> (+45, 20.0 min, Obviates(WashFace, MoistenHair))

The FI numbers are designed to be used as constraints for a linear-programming "Morning Solver" package (or perhaps as a fitness metric for a genetic algorithm-based variant). When you leave the house, you'll know: You did everything you could.

—HP LoveJet, Mar 16 2004

Greedy solver http://spookytoes.net/fi-solver.pl.txt
[egads, Oct 17 2004]

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       I would start off with negative points, I think; and not allow myself to leave the house until I'd broken zero.
—Detly, Mar 16 2004
   

       You will need some negative units, eg -15 for [Toadinnov]'s first step.   

       How do you measure where you start from? Falling into bed at 4am after a big night out you will be a lot seedier than someone who has had a shower before bed and has a cat that grooms them in their sleep.
—Lacus Trasumenus, Mar 17 2004
   

       Well-groomed. I wouldn't elide a single word.
—FarmerJohn, Mar 17 2004
   

       EnterDetailsIntoFreshnessThing -> (+5, 20 mins)   

       (BTW [LT] How can shagging get a minus from *anyone*?)   

       I would have found this useful this morning, in fact. Woke up v.v.v. late (again). For me, though, all I have to do is observe my fella intently for a minute or so and then work out what I have time to do given his rate of movement or non-movement. I've got it down to a fine art now so am ready and waiting to go as he finishes his second essential coffee. I often have time to shower, dress, go to the bakers, have breakfast , do washing, varnish front door etc. etc. Luckily, the company we work for are pretty relaxed about time keeping.
—squeak, Mar 17 2004
   

       //Have you ever woken at 07:45, realized you had to be out the door at 08:00...//   

       ...every day.
—yabba do yabba dabba, Mar 17 2004
   

       Woke up, got out of bed,
Dragged a comb across my head.
Made my way downstairs and drank a cup
And looking up, I noticed I was late...
(The Beatles, A Day in the Life).
—DrBob, Mar 17 2004
   

       Why not keep a cumulative FI by introducing another variable that determines the rate of deterioration of the effects of a particular action? For example, a shower would be (+48, 20.0, -2/hr). Working out at the gym would be (-48, 90.0, 0/hr). Every activity either contributes or detracts from your FI, and over time your FI would gradually move towards zero.
—cocktaillouie, Mar 17 2004
   

       I conjecture that AI search techniques aren't necessary in order to solve this system of constraints. I think a greedy algorithm will do: sort the items in descending order by ratio of benefit to cost, then go through the list in order, taking each item that is still within total-cost budget. See [link] for source code to test this hypothesis. Not particularly sure how I'd prove that this works in all cases.   

       Nice idea, btw :)
—egads, Mar 17 2004
   

       [squeak] only from the perspective that shagging would not be increasing your freshness ;)
—Lacus Trasumenus, Mar 17 2004
   

       [egads]! I tip my hat (DonHat -> (+5, 0.1 min)) to you. Watch out, world: the maximally fresh HP LoveJet appears tomorrow.
—HP LoveJet, Mar 17 2004
   

       Scub body with damp bath puff and towel dry (+25, 3 minutes) Great idea for the obligates among us!
—dpsyplc, Mar 17 2004
   


 

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