Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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This would work fine, except in terms of success.

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Fishties

Neckties that smell like fish
  (+45, -44)
(+45, -44)
  [vote for,
against]

Every time I sit in a meeting at work I notice the lack of a fishy smell among the executives in the conference room. Why is this?

Studies conducted by MIT, with the cooperation of the Gloucester Fishermen's Council, have proven that productivity increases when the smell of fish is in the air. This is why fishermen can work so hard and never complain. Therefore, it makes perfect sense that the modern workplace should smell like fish.

As an architect, I've investigated the possibility of piping a fish aroma through the heating and AC system of several buildings but decided that would be difficult to install in existing systems. I was beginning to decide that I would never be able to experience this wonderful smell all day long at work when I got an idea.

Why not have neckties that smell like fish? Imagine sitting down at work, sipping your coffee and taking a big 'ol whiff of your fishy smelling necktie. Just think about the work you would get done!

I have discussed the idea with several venture Capitalists and they are willing to give me seed money for this project provided I prove to them that there is a market for it, which is why I'm posting this here.

So think about it: a colorful paisley necktie with the sweet smell of a nice flounder!

dingleb, Jul 26 2000

Nice job, Jim. http://web.archive....read&thread_id=4921
Now get your Djibouti out of here. [jutta, Jul 26 2000, last modified Feb 16 2008]

Halfbakery/user/Jim http://www.halfbakery.com/user/Jim
Not this Jim, by the way. [Jim, Jul 26 2000]

No, that Jim. http://www.bondcliff.net/
[jutta, Jul 26 2000, last modified Feb 16 2008]

The secret http://web.archive....read&thread_id=4921
Brought back by the magic of the Wayback machine. [dbmag9, Sep 17 2005]

Fish tai http://www.bbc.co.u...s/magazine-20756516
Who woulda thunk it! [DrBob, Dec 18 2012]

Featured in Bizarro https://comicskingd.../bizarro/2023-08-06
Along with an eyeball, crown, O2, K2, dynamite, bird, flying saucer, pie, and Olive Oyl! [a1, Aug 06 2023]

[link]






       This seems like a really great idea. I've read different theories on this in fishing magazines actually. Of course I was overseas in Italy at the time but I figure they know what they're talking about with all that coastland and all.
Elocon, Jul 26 2000
  

       Wait-- what if this idea were COMBINED with fish-painted silk ties? The possibilities are limitless!
gmknorr, Jul 26 2000
  

       When I was in Uganda, I found that most of the people there wore neckties that smelled like fish. This works very well in their culture and would do well in ours. Then we could institute the neckties that smell of fusilli, spaghetti and cochiglie.
Donkelstein, Jul 26 2000
  

       This is a great idea! And it would even work as a reminder to feed my cat, Luxembourg, when I get home. Bravo!
bobina, Jul 26 2000
  

       Amazing idea! Although fish ties were popular a few years ago (still popular her in Paraguay) and may not come back as fashion, the fish scent really improves the idea. Perhaps Fish scented Dockers could be next??
bigbro, Jul 26 2000
  

       I've seen the ties shaped like fish, but always wondered what that particular species of fish actually smelled like. It made the lifelike rendering seem almost ridiculous. This would be an excellent teaching aid, especially in Japan, as they would have the opportunity to smell fish from the United States, and vice versa.   

       What's next? Baseball bat ties that smell like wood? Maybe even scratch and sniff ties, that would be a great social tool. How better to introduce your new line of frozen filets than by inviting people to walk up and scratch your tie! Marvelous.
shecabbage, Jul 26 2000
  

       Phenomenal idea. I actually had the same thought while returning from Mexico. Perhapsdifferent varieties of fish to go with the different colors/patterns.
peaceFrog, Jul 26 2000
  

       Studies in Sweden showed that saltwater fish odors increased productivity 4% more than freshwater. Specific species have different effects on certain parts of the brain.   

       Putting the fish smell in necktie form is brilliant! I would buy a haddock tie for days when I have sales meetings, a marlin tie when I had to fire someone, and a grouper tie on casual Friday.
shabby, Jul 26 2000
  

       This is just what I've been looking for. Ever since a boating accident in Mexico many years ago, I've taken to rubbing my clothing with fish. This can be quite messy and inconvenient and elicit odd stares from people nearby. How much better to have the lovely aroma of pike, cod or halibut (my personal favorite) built into the garment!
vbob, Jul 26 2000
  

       Excellent idea. We all know that the Inuit of Northern Canada use the smell in thier homes to create a relaxing atmosphere. Neckties are great for the men, but scarves would also have to be made with the fish scent so workplaces with mostly women would be able to take advantage as well.
Trinity, Jul 26 2000
  

       I think that's really true about the fish smell. My old roommate, who was from China, cooked all kinds of weird fish dishes, and I never got as much work done as I did around her dinner time. Maybe you could make fish panties, too...you could probably get Howard Stern to sniff them on his show, so promoting them should be easy....and think how much work HE'D get done.
JinxIsPhat, Jul 26 2000
  

       It's quite true. Imported Finnish fish oil boosts the IQ measurably, and everyone's mother has told them that fish is "brain food", so a tie emitting essence of fish directly through the sinus passages and into the brain would undoubtably increase productivityand creativity. Quite possibly it would increase the production of sexual pherenomes, making the wearer a babe magnet and smart, too. Sort of like crossing George Clooney with Albert Einstien and getting the better part of each.
doublemint, Jul 27 2000
  

       I sure wish I'd had one of those last year in the Dominican Republic. As it was, my red hair got lots of attention, but I bet a fish tie would have garnered a few marrisage proposals too!   

       Have you considered shellfish aroma? I love the smell of crabs.
paintgirl, Jul 27 2000
  

       Many people find the smell of fish objectionable, and I dare say hardly anyone finds it attractive or appropriate as a body odor. It certainly seems inappropriate for those situations where one wears a tie. I just don't get the connection or the point. By the way, India ink often has a slight fish smell, which manufacturers take great pains to eliminate or mask. Why would you want to add a fish smell to a garment? Was this intended to be some kind of joke or satire?
undermind, Jul 27 2000
  

       You people scare me.
StarChaser, Jul 27 2000
  

       Aside from its obvious lack of any value or purpose, this idea just wouldn't work. Many birds, especially gulls (and even the ubiquitous canada goose), will wildly attack anything that smells of fish. My irish setter once rolled in something fishy at the beach, and was almost pecked to death before I was able to rescue her. And besides, WHY???
mark_chaney, Jul 27 2000
  

       I think you miss the point, not the smell of dead fish, but a slight pleasent aroma of fresh or baked fish, I think this idea would go over really well in Europe, France, Sweden and Italy especially. TRex
TRex, Jul 27 2000
  

       Great idea, where else but America could somone express there ideas so freely this product could show the world how well free enterprise can really work
Omega, Jul 28 2000
  

       I like fish. What could be better than to smell like one all the time up here in Minnesota, the land of 10,000 Lakes! Plus, it would remind me of my girlfriend!
funk, Jul 28 2000
  

       This place looks like Japan after the war!
madonna, Jul 28 2000
  

       Growing up in the Canadian maritimes, I love the sent of the sea and fresh caught fish (however, not the fishing docks). I would be all for smelling an aroma that brought me back to my youth on the rocky coast of Newfoundland. It would bring a refreshing change to the processed air in the office. You might want to consider trying something that smelled like fried fish, particularly for people who are restraunteers. Bakeries pump out the aroma of fresh baked goodies and it works for them!
Gimmer, Jul 28 2000
  

       Why not just wear a fish?
kimble, Jul 29 2000
  

       Ever tried tying a fish into a Windsor knot?
bookworm, Jul 29 2000
  

       I read about this fish and productivity correlation in the Whole Earth catalog many years ago. After a few experimental Croatian fish dinners, I found that my memory and creativity both benefit from an elusive fried catfish aroma in my workspace. I don't see why a tie or other clothing couldn't be developed to mimic this effect.
julesverne, Jul 31 2000
  

       yes, the success of the "smells like a fish" panties and bra show that neckties would bring this wonderful idea to the male part of the homo sapien species.
007, Jul 31 2000
  

       AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!
wynken, Aug 01 2000
  

       I know a car salesman (don't we all?) that would just suit a tie that smelled of Shark.
Alcin, Aug 12 2000
  

       This whole idea smells a bit fishy to me.
wrenchndmachine, Sep 28 2000
  

       Fincense.
thumbwax, Sep 28 2000
  

       Call me a John Dory-come-lately, but I can't believe no-one's mentioned kipper ties.
OnionBread, Apr 21 2003
  

       //As an architect, I've investigated the possibility of piping a fish aroma through the heating and AC system of several buildings but decided that would be difficult to install in existing systems//
As a controls engineering operative, I am aware of the possibility of a dead halibut stuffed into the fresh air plenum.
That'll do the trick!.
gnomethang, Sep 17 2005
  

       Hmm...   

       I actually give this a croissant.   

       I dont know why... HELPHELPhelphelp......   

       h
e
l
p

m
e
!
  

       And it turns out this is a scam idea! Hahahaha... Good laugh, with the annos.
DesertFox, Sep 17 2005
  

       Be Quiet, [DF].
gnomethang, Sep 17 2005
  

       I ran across this idea when I was deployed to Iraq, but worried I might be to much of a newbie to have churn rights.   

       I'd wear one.
MikeD, Feb 27 2010
  

       I'd wear something out of the same product range, not smelling of fish though... [+]   

       [edit] Back when I was a 'lil kid in Australia...
xxobot, Mar 03 2010
  

       I'd eat one if it was a real fish.
FlyingToaster, Mar 03 2010
  

       Amazing. If you hype it up enough then everybody will want to do it. It'll also probably work because we evolved from fish. A great big fishbone for you, from the Gulf of Mexico.
quantum_flux, Oct 14 2010
  

       The title had me expecting some sort of sick snack food. (+)   

       [bbsof] Very occasionally, people do post ideas that are not about sick snack food.
mouseposture, Oct 15 2010
  

       I am pleased to see this idea appear again. Despite its dubious provenance, I feel there is something almost true to the character of the 1/2B about this idea and its pseudo-annotations. The fact that it has (currently) [+37, -38] seems poignantly appropriate.
pocmloc, Oct 15 2010
  

       People feeding off fear and confusion. It's been going on for centuries in places like Transylvania.
infidel, Oct 15 2010
  

       [Infidel] must mean in the Soviet nuclear catastrophe Union, Transylvania (located under the North Pole Ice Sheets) where the atomic zombie vampires all wear dead fishties to ward off the living succubuses. It's such a cold dead place to go to, but I hear the fishties are selling like hotcakes over there.
quantum_flux, Oct 16 2010
  

       Years ago I worked in a low-end haberdashery: some products from then third-world countries (and Poland oddly enough) incorporated (not very visually attractive) shark and dolphin leather into items: belts, jacket lapels, shirt and pants' pockets, etc. Now I know why. The trick, as far as I can tell, is to get it to the point where the odour is not noticeable. No clue if the effects wear off in the wash/dry-cleaners.
FlyingToaster, Feb 22 2012
  

       So... they sold sharkskin suits with real sharkskin?
mouseposture, Feb 22 2012
  

       "sharkskin suits" weren't actually sharkskin. But (real) sharkskin leather, known as 'shagreen' (a coarse leather) is used for other things such as book covers. The word 'chagrin' is related.   

       Presumably the pieces in the Polish suits were too small to be used for bookbinding. They did retain a fishy odour close up though. I glanced across something once about the chemicals being similar in structure to human pheremones, but it didn't mention if the molecule was also the one responsible for the fishy odour.
FlyingToaster, Feb 22 2012
  

       Ahem, it was meant as a joke.   

       //shagreen// Thanks, I hadn't known that. Apparently, it used to be made from asses, among other things. There's also a dermatological lesion called a shagreen patch: skin, but not leather. If I had one on my ass, I'd try to get my executor to have a book bound in it. That section of the will would begin "I am deeply chagrined ..." No one would get it. Why should I care? I'd be dead.   

       //The pieces in the Polish suits were too small// Hercules Grytpype-Thynne might have a market for suits made from very small pieces of sharksin.
mouseposture, Feb 22 2012
  

       such a finely balanced half-bun. one more fishbone to establish equilibrium
simonj, Feb 23 2012
  

       Sorry. I kind of like it, especially since I don't wear a tie to work.
Alterother, Feb 23 2012
  

       Rather wonderfully, I stumbled across an article that mentions fish tai's and, even better, they are in Japan which enables me to post an anno in keeping with the original joke. Hoorah! (linky).
DrBob, Dec 18 2012
  

       I was browsing the intarwebs just the other day when out of nowhere a spate of temporally clustered references to Adolph Hitler caused me to wonder what might be behind the phenomenon. Had I made a false mistake, or did I mackerel one?
zen_tom, Dec 17 2020
  

       Are people actively adjusting their vote to try and keep this idea almost but not quite balanced? I know I am.
pocmloc, Dec 17 2020
  

       Wherever he appears, my code should - in theory - find him, [zen].   

       Unless of course it's a villa up-country in Paraguay or something ...
8th of 7, Dec 17 2020
  

       I thot this idea was a fignewton of my imagination but here it is.
whatrock, Dec 30 2022
  

       Love the classics. [+]
doctorremulac3, Dec 30 2022
  
      
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