Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Poop Fortune Teller Toilet

 Porcelain throne that dispenses fortunes based on characteristics of the poop
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Say you're at the office, and its about a half hour after your big power lunch. Right. So you get that sinking feeling and head to the can. Land your tailpipe on this highly-advanced pot that will analyze incoming individual turds. It will then dispense advice/fortunes/commentary based upon the size, weight, shape, and smell of your poop.
—corporatedipshit, Mar 13 2004

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       Go to Japan.
—kropotkin, Mar 13 2004
   

       The existing ones don't work. I once made the EXACT SAME type of poop in two different toilets -- one in Tokyo, one in Osaka -- and they gave me totally different fortunes.
—phundug, Mar 14 2004
   

       [phundug] how can you be sure? Furthermore, they may well account for the time of day in their analysis, or atmospheric conditions.
—whatastrangeperson, Mar 14 2004
   

       Look, I was there, okay? I know what happened, and I know first-hand how misleading those fortunes were.
—phundug, Mar 14 2004
   

       I see your next meal, progressing quickly down a large pipe, joining with other people's meals towards the collective. This will happen sometime in the next 24 hours.
—RayfordSteele, Mar 14 2004
   

       Fish. If it starts swimming upstream, RUN! It's homesick and it wants to crawl back in.
—UnaBubba, Mar 15 2004
   

       "The stool! The stool!...A man can regularly produce a copious and well formed evacuation and still be a stranger to reason!"   

       'kew!
—timbeau, Mar 15 2004
   


 

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