Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Sierpinski dunking cookie

Badly needed
  (+8)(+8)
(+8)
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Many forms of biscuit (cookie) are greatly improved by a brief immersion in a hot beverage.

However, some varieties have a tendency to structural failure if the dip time is not very carefully controlled.

Making the comestible thicker increases durability, but compromises the absorbtion of liquid.

Nil desperandum; simply switch your grocery purchasing policy to include the new BorgCo Sierpinsky Cookies. Engineered around the topological form of the Sierpinsky Carpet <link>, with apertures down to the nanometre range, they are guaranteed to absorb the optimum amount of liquid without falling to bits.

Note: Packed by mass, not volume - contents may settle.

8th of 7, Mar 17 2017

Sierpinski Carpet https://en.wikipedi...i/Sierpinski_carpet
Fascinating [8th of 7, Mar 17 2017]

Hawaiian earrings https://en.wikipedi...ki/Hawaiian_earring
[not_morrison_rm, Mar 17 2017]

Use NPM JSON cookies https://www.npmjs.com/package/json-cookie
[pashute, Mar 20 2017]

[link]






       Could come with a pair of complimentary Hawaiian earrings. Link.
not_morrison_rm, Mar 17 2017
  

       Based on the title, I thought "80% this is [8th]". Of course, the difference between "consistent" and "predictable" is largely semantic.   

       One thing, though. The solid part of the biscuit will need to be stronger and more dunkproof than a regular biscuit, if only because there will be less of it, and it has to support the weight of tea or coffee trapped meniscially in the interstices.   

       On the plus side, though, at least you have used the word "beverage" correctly. My recent trips to the US have revealed that Americans use it quite incorrectly and indiscriminately. I was actually asked by a waiter in a cocktail lounge if I "would like to order a beverage", whereas I had a pressing need for a drink. Equally, I have accepted offers of a "drink" in the US only to be offered Coke, water, or similar diluents. It is all very distressing, both linguistically and alcoholically.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 17 2017
  

       // the difference between "consistent" and "predictable" is largely semantic. //   

       Actually, the difference between "consistent" and "predictable" is that they don't have all the same letters in them, and the ones they do share - c, e, i, and t - aren't in the same order.
8th of 7, Mar 17 2017
  

       //The solid part of the biscuit will need to be stronger and more dunkproof than a regular biscuit// ow, con't rare; just dunk in microgravity and keep the acceleration low
lurch, Mar 17 2017
  

       A decent shortbread has a wide dunking tolerance window.   

       Maybe biscuits should come with a colour code for recommended dunking times and tolerance band.
bigsleep, Mar 17 2017
  

       I prefer to dunk my chocolate-chip cookies in cold milk, not a hot beverage.
Vernon, Mar 18 2017
  

       The product will perform well in cold milk, although the rate of absorbtion will be proportionately slower.
8th of 7, Mar 18 2017
  

       You probably don't actually need anything of an essentially fractal topology. If biscuits were made like microfibre, perhaps.
Ian Tindale, Mar 18 2017
  

       No, but we make more money this way.   

       We don't need the money, of course; we only do it for entertainment.
8th of 7, Mar 18 2017
  

       Hmm, how about a layer of rice paper in the middle of the biscuit for capillary action, also handy if you need to do some chromatography in a hurry.
not_morrison_rm, Mar 18 2017
  

       //You probably don't actually need anything of an essentially fractal topology. If biscuits were made like microfibre, perhaps//   

       Actually, this might work if the biscuits could somehow be made from large numbers of small particles (which, for simplicity, I will call "crumbs"), which were made to cohese, perhaps by some kind of heat treatment (which, for simplicity, I will call "baking"). Whether we yet possess any kind of technology that can even approach this, I truly do not know.   

       Oh and, [8th], congratulations on your recent promotion. I didn't even know Cube _had_ a Chief Assistant Tea-boy.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 18 2017
  

       Great snack if you're counting calories.
RayfordSteele, Mar 18 2017
  

       Is this a job for a 3D cookie printer? Admittedly the nozzle would have to be adapted to blob and bake at the same time to gain the necessary accuracy needed for mm engineered biscuits. Engineering biscuits ...mmmm.
wjt, Mar 18 2017
  

       You should post that (but google it first).
8th of 7, Mar 19 2017
  

       The fundamental problem with this idea is that the amount of take-up of beverage by the cookie is proportional to the surface area of the cookie - beverage comes into contact with the cookie surface and is absorbed through that surface so the greater the surface area, the greater the volume of beverage absorption. The Sierpinski cookie has an infinite surface area, and so will easily absorb an entire mug of tea, leaving none for contemplative sipping. Further, it comes with substantial risk - for example, accidentally dropping a Sierpinski cookie into the sea will result in the entire volume of all the world's seas and oceans being rapidly absorbed, resulting in the destruction of all sea life, the breakdown of the water cycle, desertification, famine and the end of all life on Earth.
hippo, Mar 21 2017
  

       <manic giggling>   

       A pretty much flawless idea, then ...
8th of 7, Mar 21 2017
  

       It'd be good if someone were to invent the Julia set teaspoon.
Ian Tindale, Mar 21 2017
  

       // accidentally dropping a Sierpinski cookie into the sea will result in the entire volume of all the world's seas and oceans being rapidly absorbed//   

       There'll be other problems long before that. In order to create the infinite surface area of the Sierpinski biscuit, an infinite number of holes have to be created. This will entail removing an infinite amount of mass from the biscuit "blank". Since that removed material must be put in a finite space, it will create a region of infinite density into which everything will fall gravitationally.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 21 2017
  

       // accidentally dropping a Sierpinski cookie into the sea will result in the entire volume of all the world's seas and oceans being rapidly absorbed//   

       That made me snort my hot coffee'd cookie that I was in the process of eating, and I burnt the inside of my right nare. Now I'm suing. And there will be hell to pay. Hahahahaha...
blissmiss, Mar 21 2017
  

       Haha.   

       <opens Fake Spider Selection Box, picks out dinner-plate sized specimen with dripping fangs, glowing red eyes, and battery-powered scuttling legs, places reverently into padded envelope addressed to [bliss]>   

       // a region of infinite density into which everything will fall gravitationally. //   

       It's called a "forced quantum singularly", and it's a cheap, reliable and portable energy source. We're bemused that your species still don't use them. Then again, any life-form that thinks a microprocessor with a segmented memory architecture and a non-orthogonal instruction set is a good idea is obviously only at the very first step of a long, hard, uphill path towards anything even approximating to civilization...
8th of 7, Mar 21 2017
  

       Transputers didn't catch on - they were deemed not daft enough.
Ian Tindale, Mar 21 2017
  

       I always thought it was because they look like "trainspotters".
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 21 2017
  

       Menger sponge finger. [+] for hippo's observation
calum, Mar 21 2017
  

       mmm, yum! (assuming that "sponge finger" isn't some disgusting Scottish euphemism)
hippo, Mar 21 2017
  

       Ineedabiscuit.
beanangel, Mar 22 2017
  

       Fractalicious!
Cuit_au_Four, Mar 22 2017
  
      
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