Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The Emergenceiling

Car Ceiling Mounted Emergency/Firt-Aid Kit
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As your consciousness returns you find your legs entrapped by the dashboard. You're bloody, you're in terrible pain and your first aid kit is no more than a bitter irony as it rests, useless in your trunk.

You succumb to hemorrhagic shock, your last few fleeting moments; frustrated and sardonic.

This terrible death could have been avoided with "The Emergenceiling". A multi-pocketed car ceiling covering made of tough Cordura. Each of the many utility pockets filled with useful first-aid/emergency equipment.

Dress your wounds with gauze in pocket #14, see what your doing with the handy LED penlight from pocket #37. Disentangle your legs from the dashboard with the hacksaw blade in pocket #72 and control the bleeding from your self performed bilateral amputations with the hemostats in pocket #73 and #74.

Emergenceiling Deluxe comes stocked with the same emergency items as the standard model, plus convenience items such as cross-word puzzles and morphine.

MikeD, May 15 2009

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       If there were many others similarly trapped alongside, and the shift lever had actually poked a hole in you, your last few fleeting moments might be fenestrated and sardinic.
bungston, May 15 2009
  

       And most notably: remove the spatula from #45 from your scalp with the spatual-remover from #46....
loonquawl, May 18 2009
  

       //sardinic// - (adj.) - of, or relating to, sardines.
hippo, May 18 2009
  

       ... with a good wine and some grapes it is fructated and sardic.
loonquawl, May 18 2009
  


 

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