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10-Dimensional Chocolate

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Chocolate confectioners long ago invented 'death by chocolate,' ie. chocolate-chip laced chocolate cake or brownie frosted with chocolate, layered with chocolate, and injected with chocolate pudding. They didn't know how to take the next step to cram more in as clearly the problem is that there are only so many dimensions that standard chocolate can fill.

If that was death by chocolate, then this is a chocolate Shub-Niggurath coming to claim your soul and spirit and drag it into the outer realms where the Great Old Ones live. Our gastro-scientists have energized and pressed the theobromine molecule into 7 more string dimensions, resulting in even more chocolate density goodness per bite.

RayfordSteele, May 24 2015

The Dunwich Horror https://ebooks.adel...nwich/chapter5.html
Paragraph 3 [8th of 7, Jan 17 2018]


       You can't do that...can you?
blissmiss, May 24 2015

       What if you're fractalactose intolerant? What then?   

       Isn’t that just metal? Only, made of chocolate?
Ian Tindale, May 24 2015

       So now all my 7 string dimensions will have to take a whiz. That will be ok if the strings vector uphill.
wjt, May 25 2015

       Not an actual product [-]
Voice, May 26 2015

       //bit flakey// I think the idea as stated could do with some kind of Boost; And as it happens, it's clear that chocolate from this Galaxy must conform to Blorone's law of Prismatic forms, otherwise it'll all go Curley Wurley - I have heard rumours of an alternate formulation, but it's just Hershey right now.
zen_tom, May 26 2015

       <grits teeth and resists the temptation to point out that Hershey's is not actually chocolate>
MaxwellBuchanan, May 26 2015

       I was busy tuning my chocolate Washburn acoustic when it spoke back, spouting string theories about it's top string, (which happens to be it's G-string) It said, -said Washy Washburn- "if you tighten that any more my ass is gunna SNAP"!
Edie, Jan 17 2018

       // chocolate Shub-Niggurath //   

       Chocolate profiteroles with chocolate sauce and extra chocolate [+]   

       // where the Great Old Ones live. //   

       The Great Old Ones do not "live" in any sense meaningful to humans. We refer you to the relevant pages of the dreaded Necronomicon of the Mad Arab Abdul Alhazred. <link>   

       Cthulhu f'thagn ! (with extra white chocolate sprinkles)   

       Actually, a chocolate Cthulhu who sucks out your soul but then replaces it with Lindt & Sprüngli confectionary might find itself beset by a distressingly large number of alarmingly eager adherents ...
8th of 7, Jan 17 2018

       //Cthulhu f'thagn//   

       The thing that puts me off the whole Cthulhu thing is all that Welsh. The fact that it's an immense load of bollocks is another disincentive.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jan 18 2018

       "Cthulhu" isn't a welsh name - it contains two vowels, and only one "l".   

       But it's an easy mistake to make.   

       Besides, Cthulhu is described as a "vast, malign, brooding intelligence". Trying to juxtapose "vast intelligence" and "welsh" just can't work.
8th of 7, Jan 18 2018

       //chocolate-chip laced chocolate cake or brownie frosted with chocolate, layered with chocolate, and injected with chocolate pudding//   

       Sprinkle the outside with cocoa powder, make that double chocolate pudding, make it a layer cake with chocolate icing and chocolate chips between layers, and serve it on a chocolate plate garnished with German chocolate.
Voice, Jan 26 2018

       //German chocolate.//   

       No. Nein. The Germans, precision engineers that they are, don't really get chocolate. Even the Swiss, it has to be said, tend to over-engineer their chocolate. The Belgians, however, do understand chocolate - they are the only nation in Europe not to allow any vegetable fat in their chocolate. Indeed, this may be the only reason for Belgium's continued existence.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jan 26 2018

       So, I don't really get these "death by chocolate" things. So chocolate cake with chocolate icing by definition contains things other than chocolate (e.g. flour, sugar). So substituting an equal amount of 99% dark chocolate surely would be more chocolatey and would hasten the death of the eater?   

       So, then, if such an amount of 99% dark chocolate is not enough, merely eat more of the same.   

       So anything else is diluted which is by definition less chocolatey, so [ ]
pocmloc, Jan 26 2018

       Sorry, I wasn’t listening.
Ian Tindale, Jan 27 2018

       //So, I don't really get these "death by chocolate" things.//   

       Well, they make great dog treats.
Wrongfellow, Jan 27 2018

       That's the caffeine and theobromine, not the chocolate itself. They can be extracted - it doesn't make any difference to the flavour or texture of the chocolate.
8th of 7, Jan 27 2018


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