h a l f b a k e r y
There's no money in it.
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
or get an account
Feb a toddler, July a middle aged guy, October a dignified
elderly gentleman (None of that sad looking father time
I'm not sure who'd adopt this concept, the same people who
use art showing a baby and old man to symbolize the new
year. Greeting card makers or advertisers maybe.
month would show this character with a shirt that
says "June" or whatever month it's supposed to represent. It
would also need explanations for each usage. For instance,
advertisement might show a middle age man at the
wearing a "July" shirt with the copy saying "2018 has hit
age, time to start thinking about refinancing before the year
gets too old."
So the outline might be something like this:
February is a 7 year old. Full of youthful exuberance and joy
looking forward to the coming months and a great year.
March is a 14 year old. The teenage portion of the year.
Optimistic, vibrant and prone to breaking the rules.
April is the 21 year old. Party time!
May is 28, the year is in its mature youth. Achievements are
getting completed, goals are getting reached.
June is 35. Middle age, the year is starting to feel rich and
July is 42. The hard work has led to fruitful maturity. Time
August is 49. Time to think about slowing down and taking it
easy in the coming months. Planning to actually do some of
the year's fun bucket list items.
Sept is 56. The golden years approaching. Time to
the finer things in life.
Oct is 63. This is where we start cherishing time with family
and loved ones. It's OK to reminisce over the ups and downs
the past months.
Nov is 70. The year is old now. But the real payoffs of all the
hard work of the year are coming into focus. It's been a
Dec is 77. Time to look back at a wonderful year and be
thankful for all it brought.
Don't know if that's something that could catch on.
are always looking for an angle. Anthropomorphizing the
might give copywriters a template to allow a little more
creativity than the standard holiday based seasonal
For me it would represent the idea that a year could be
looked at like a life.
You want to get something out of it before it's gone eh?
[Treejuice, Nov 30 2017]
Oh salad, I never knew such ecstatic joy before you.
[doctorremulac3, Dec 01 2017]
||I guess its luckily not one of those calendars that shows
part of the next year for forward planning, cos then you get
a series of decomposing bodies: January; looking a bit
bloated, too much partying? Feb: shit one of its eyes just
fell out. March: quick bash its head in with a stick
||Yes cool idea, it could get more detailed too like something
for every day, also I think you could market it more ways
like 2 people in love, one each end of the year (symmetrical
dates) and they move through the stages of courtship
towards the middle of the year when BAM, baby!! and from
1st July the 'Age of Man' associated months could begin xD
||Or it could be cool if it's biannual so when it gets to old man
december, then it reverses ------ old man january down to
new born december
||Oh people born in different months - it could be like a new
'star sign' like that's their special age -- ''oh, he's an old soul''
''oh she's young-at-heart''
||Also I think it would be fun to extend the timescale from a
year to like, 76 years or something, a recurring cycle. Like a
saeculum but more literal,
year 1, year of the new born,
year 21, party year
year 45, crisis year etc. etc.
||This is sort of OK, apart from the bits from August through December. May I suggest:
||August is 49. Shit, I'm almost 50, what happened to the last 49 years? OK, I have now got to work really, really hard to catch up.
||September is 56. Shiiiiiit, I'm 60 in round numbers. Why didn't I listen to myself back in August?
||October is 63. Well fuck it. Time to start smoking again, now that I stand a good chance of being dead before it has any serious effects. And all those drugs I avoided because I was afraid they'd mess up my life? Well, now's the time.
||November is 70. Remember how you always wanted to try bungee jumping, but didn't want to risk spending the next 50 years in a wheelchair? Well... It's also time to start using some of your hard-won life skills to try your hand at armed robbery - I mean, even if it all goes wrong, how meaningful will a 40 years-to-life sentence be?
||December is 77. Shitshitshit. I forgot to run for president back when I was 71.
||Yea, but won't sell a lot of products with the real
reaction people have to life's turning points, most
of which have people saying "SHIT! You mean I'm
old now?" It's all about over the top positivity.
||Gotta put yourself in the mindset of advertisers.
You and I might decide that the best way to sell,
for instance, a salad restaurant, would be to show
people enjoying a salad. That's why we're not in
advertising. To sell salad you show people
convulsing in orgasmic delight and experience
kind of cosmic joy explosion. (See link)
||I've actually got a theory that advertising might
have a positive effect on a society's overall
psychological outlook. Seeing all those people
laughing at salad might bolster you with subliminal
positive messages. Certainly if you see a lot of
advertising, the economy of your society is
probably doing pretty well so that helps too.
||As far the salad adds, I know that deep down I
think "Shit! I should probably be eating a salad and
laughing! What the fuck is wrong with me?" LL.
||I think I'm aiming for the grumpy-old-man demographic.
||You could also do the calendar based on disease prevalence. January - You're seven years old, and close to peak risk for bacterial meningitis leaving you without the use of your limbs...... April - statistically, you are now a prime candidate for death by car accident or by violence, or both....September - You're 56, and just hitting the high on the cancer diagnosis curve. November - Welcome to the Alzheimer's High Risk group.
||"July is here, death will be near."
||Don't know how you'd tie that into selling products
||Add "Death of high prices that is."
||Got another idea. (Oh, great, please tell us.) How
about a grim reaper (of high prices) as a mascot?
Or even more ill advised, a Jack the Ripper psycho
character "SLASHING! SLASHING! SLASHING! HIGH
PRICES!" You'd get people's attention. Not sure
what product that would be appropriate for
||Nope, looked it up. Already been done. Price
slashing ninjas apprear to be popular.
||Treejuice, re the saeculum post. Very cool. I should
probably go back and incorporate this into the idea.
||//Not sure what product that would be appropriate for though. // Knives, maybe?
||Palliative care or hospice services?
||Ahh, screw it. I'd sell those with hilarious salads too.
||Makes me think of Solomon Grundy, born on a Monday,
something something on a Tuesday ... la la la (I forget the
middle bit )but hes dead on Saturday, buried on Sunday.
||So as weird (dumb?) as this idea might be, the
concept is out there for some reason.
||Christened, married, took ill, worse.