h a l f b a k e r yProfessional croissant on closed course. Do not attempt.
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Is your coffee mug ready to face the austere conditions of the modern battlefield?
Unless you own an ArMUGeddon (brought to you by MikeD Enterprises), it's not.
Constructed from over-lapping boron carbide tiles held in an aluminium matrix, your morning cup of coffee will enjoy protection from war-related
nuisances such as, but not limited to:
Fragment Projectiles*
AP Projectiles*
API Projectiles*
HEAT warheads*
DU Projectiles*
EFPs*
Thermobaric Detonations**
Nuclear Weapons**
Thermonuclear Weapons**
So get your ArMUGeddon coffee mug today and rest easy, knowing nobody's getting to your coffee but you!
* of certain size/diameter
** from certain distances
http://t3.gstatic.c...NmRf6yTfcSf_c7yF0YX
[rcarty, Oct 24 2011]
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Annotation:
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Naturally, I heartily endorse this
product, and I suspect the Borg will as well, whenever they
next show thier augmented faces around here. Chobham is
one of the many great British inventions they've shared
with us, along mac 'n' cheese and the Triumph Speed
Triple. |
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Nice to see the thermonuclear resistance. Coffee sucks when it's overcooked. Will you eventually offer a "Swiss Army Mug" with optional attachments? Toilet paper dispenser? Screw gun? Wood chipper? No matter, I heartily and enthusiastically bun [+]. |
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"The best part of waking up, is napalm in your cup!" |
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My *THIRD* starbucks coffee mug broke this morning in an unintentional collision with the concrete floor. If this keeps up, commisioning the manufacture of an "ArMUGeddon" might actually be cheaper. |
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The name sucks, but I couldn't think of anything cevererer. I'd be happy to take suggestions. I know you Britts develope wit in utero. |
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Sorry, don't mind me. I'll be going now... |
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<Automobile salesman voice> |
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Should your ArMUGeddon get tipped over, it will automatically jettison its payload and assume a lateral recumbent "stand-by" position, until its user resumes control of it! Thereby preventing you, *as the user* from inadvertently drinking coffee that might have become contaminated during your syncopic episode, and making it safe for you to retrieve your ArMUGeddon in any orientation without fear of spilling its contents! |
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It's like an ejection seat AND an autopilot for your mug! |
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It's things like this that make me proud to be a
mammal. |
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I feel the same way about weasels. |
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I feel the same way about platupuses. |
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I think [methinksnot] has just captured the gestalt of the HB in two words. |
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The target market for this product is not, as you might think, rugged individualists with keen survival skills and an almost fanatical devotion to talking about firearms. No, it is instead chinless singleton middle managers looking by their office accoutrements to project an image - any image! - other than "weapons-obsessed premature ejaculator". The irony being, of course, in the event that the ArMUGeddon is styled in a manner that is in the slightest different from a normal coffee mug, said middle manager will by purchasing this product merely increase the likelihood that colleagues will gather by the workplace microwave to hazard guesses as to the extent to which his tighty whiteys are presently jizz-crusted. |
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Excellent, [calum]. You should do the marketing for this product. |
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