Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'

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Auto Inflate Cushion Slacks
No need to look for a soft chair again!
  (+13, -1)(+13, -1)
(+13, -1)
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Further to the chair pants idea and the Dilbert related inflatable slacks... but inspired by those doughnut shaped cushions you get for people with sore bums.

A long thin inflatable balloon is hidden within the lining of the seat of a pair of trousers (forming a kind of horseshoe shape). The said balloon is attached to a small pneumatic pump - controlled by an array of sensors (be it optical, thermal, motion-based, whatever they do with car airbags...) so that as a person sits down the balloon is immediately and silently inflated, creating a most comfortable cushion.

As soon as the person gets up, the balloon deflates (could be automatic - could be button-press)

This is ideal for those of us that A) have sore and delicate backsides and/or B) have nothing comfy to sit on.

Imagine, as you are waiting for you date to arrive, there is only a cold, hard set of concrete steps to sit on... but you don't mind!

*A possible problem arrises when trying to sit down on already adequately comfy chair or -God forbid- an extremely comfy armchair. Too much comfort?*

*Also - could change meaning of 'passing wind' should you sit on something sharp*


Jinbish, Jun 28 2002

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       "does my bum look big in this?"

po, Jun 28 2002
  

       Big? Maybe. Squidgy? Definitely

Jinbish, Jun 28 2002
  

       Do they deflate with a quiet hiss or an almighty PARP? Either way, I'll take three pairs.

calum, Jun 28 2002
  

       Inflatables of any stripe almost always get a croissant from me.

You'd probably find that there would be a good market for pneumatic systems designed for the front side of the pants as well.

quarterbaker, Jun 28 2002
  

       // whatever they do with car airbags... //   

       You want to actually stay on the seat, right?   

       This could be built into bike seats too, for that 'riding on air' feeling.

drew, Jun 28 2002
  

       [calum]: They shall hiss for a second or two...rumble and the PAAAAARP! Just for you. Everyone elses shall be silent.   

       [quarterbaker]: There might well be a market for that - some of us wouldnt need it though....(sorry)   

       [drew]: Well if they inflated too hard, too quickly it'll be a fun spacehopper like experience.

Jinbish, Jun 28 2002
  

       This could be very useful if you fall in a pool of very deep water and are not a very good swimmer.   

       Or what if you filled it with Helium (sorry Helium) and could literally lift yourself by the seat of your pants and carry yourself around?

Matty, Jun 28 2002
  

       Matty- I have this image of a non-swimmer floating upside down in the lake, just shoes and ankles protruding.

rbl, Jun 28 2002
  

       Well someone would surely try it. And likely die. And others would try downhill snow tubing in them, etc.   

       I like the reasoning behind the original idea, though. Comfort before fashion, until comfort BECOMES fashion.

Matty, Jun 28 2002
  

       [rbl] I wouldn't be associated with devices with the potenial to kill by accident - they either kill really well, or not at all.   

       The said slacks would be balasted just perfectly so that the wearer floats in safety...AND comfort.   

       My brandname (?) is a name that can be trusted!   

       No fatalities OR MONEY BACK! (well maybe not money, but coupons)

Jinbish, Jun 28 2002
  

       Ya know, with a slightly modified hose attachment, you could really make the best of a beaney dinner once you're through with the aforementioned date. Or, alternatively, you could use these pants as an elaborate whoopee cushion if there were some kind of hand pump squeegie release thingy in your pocket.   

       Sorry, couldn't resist. Feel free to throw a tomato or two.

polartomato, Jun 29 2002
  

       During trials for the D-Day invasion, the Germans attacked and sank three landing craft in the mouth of the Thames. About 720 men died. Many of them had put their inflatable liferings on, around their waists. They were found floating, head down, in the water. probably best not to try using these as a flotation device.   

       These would be excellent for long meetings and seminars. I can just imagine 1500 users in a large auditorium, listening to Anthony Robbins spruiking on... PAAARRRPPPP!... and on... PAAARRRPPPP!...

UnaBubba, Jun 29 2002
  

       [polartomato] hmmm, surely with a hose attachment, and a bigger supply of air, and a couple of small holes in the ballon the cushion slacks would become...HOVER-PANTS!!! You coukld zip about on your own cushion of air like some kind of Genie!!!   

       I would endorse this idea...as long as it fits within the idea of the original...its comfy.   

       [Unabubba] Was it the flotation device that killed the soldiers? or the torpedoes? anyhoo....at least if they had cushion slacks they would have met their maker without a sore bum. Although admittedly they would have their work cut out for them explaining to St Peter that they aren't some kind of balloon obsessed deviant.

Jinbish, Jun 29 2002
  

       The life rings. Most of the weight in a human body is above the waist. Gravity did the rest. They think that up to 400 died of drowning through this error.

UnaBubba, Jun 29 2002
  

       D'oh! Thats pretty sad. History shall not repeat itself with any of my half baked inventions...apart from the bad jokes -like the evil that men do, they live on and on...

Jinbish, Jun 30 2002
  
      
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