Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Braveheart Soccer

Full blown Battle with a Ball
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Two teams, a couple hundred on a side, face each other for the kick-off. Large open field is the setting, and the whistle blows. Carnage ensues as the swords clang and the arrows fly. The forward (knight in armor) has the ball and gets hacked with a battle axe. The midfielder (light armor/mace) ferries the ball down in within shooting range only to be pelted with bolts from the defenders crossbows.

Yes, the object ultimately to score goals and try to stay alive.

A bloody mess, but hey, it's better than golf.

dag, Mar 22 2002

Brockian Ultra-Cricket http://www.geocitie...one/2352/brock.html
From the HHGTTG [mwburden, Mar 22 2002]

[link]






       I'm sure the origins of football are not too far removed from this.

There is still a game played somewhere in England every year I believe, where the teams are basically every man in the town born north of the river against every man born south of it. The goals are two poles in the ground that are three and a half miles apart and the rules seem to be that no weapons are allowed. But apart from that everything goes. Last time I heard it had gone some three years since a goal was even scored.

Of course there is also that game the Incas(or Aztecs - not sure) played - kind of like basketball, except that the loosing team were killed and their families sold into slavery by the wining team. Now there's a real mans game.
mcscotland, Mar 22 2002
  

       Ah, so you've never played full contact golf?
rbl, Mar 22 2002
  

       How does it being on a battle field make it 'Braveheart', surely it should just be battle field soccer. Incidentally, Braveheart is one of the most flawed films out there, right down the costumes.
[ sctld ], Mar 22 2002
  

       The Braveheart terminology is just to invoke a picture most people can associate with, whether accurate or not.
dag, Mar 22 2002
  

       Yeah true sctld, its well known as fiction - my mates from Cork were in the Battle of Stirling Bridge scene. Filmed of course in Ireland. And with no bridge. Still, what can you do, the "facts" were only recorded in Blind Harry's poem so you have to expect at least some artistic license.
mcscotland, Mar 22 2002
  

       Sounds a lot like Brockian Ultra-Cricket (see link)
mwburden, Mar 22 2002
  

       Mcscotland, what you're remembering is 'pelota'. The losing team was often sacrificed. Unless the winning team was...or both.
StarChaser, Mar 23 2002
  

       SC: Last I heard, the archeologists were pretty sure that it was the winners that were sacraficed (to go live with the gods). The losers were disgraced by having to perform the sacrafice, and then they were outcast. Not a good plan for survival of the fittest when you take all of your fittest, kill half of them and banish the rest!
mwburden, Mar 24 2002
  

       This needs cows that just run around in madnes and helpfull items that apear out of air. Full of Dutch bravery, may I ad a croissant?
postseti, Jul 08 2002
  

       I like.. Why didn't I think of that. Adds quite another dimension to a dimented game.
dag, Jul 09 2002
  

       I'm sacrificing a fish for this idea.
disbomber, Apr 06 2005
  
      
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