Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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I like this idea, only I think it should be run by the government.

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Cannondrum

There will be concussionquenses and re-percussions.
  (+14, -2)(+14, -2)
(+14, -2)
  [vote for,
against]

The enemy will not approach any closer to the towering walls of stone.
They remain just beyond the range of cannons and are assembling what appears to be some new form of siege engine unlike anything before devised. Confident of the citadels' defenses, and the inability of any army to breach these walls in the past, you wonder why they even bother as you climb the parapet for an unobstructed view.

For eight days now the enemy has been stripping bare the small copse of Cedar between the keep and the river, peeling and stripping timbers while their Smiths fashion brackets and couplings and strangely enough scores of tailors frantically stitch together animal hides. Only today have they begun to assemble the framework they've constructed.
It is much more massive than any siege tower or engine that you have ever heard of and looks completely useless for the storming of a fortress. Quickly now the shape of their design begins to reveal itself. A massive series of hoops, five...maybe six stories tall, which they begin connecting and cross bracing to create a shallow cylinder which faces the keep.

"If they are planning on rolling that contraption down on us, they've got it turned the wrong way." you mutter to your replacement as you head for the sentry barracks. Tomorrow should bring a bit more of an idea as to what they have in mind.

The first light of false dawn is heralded by three blasts of the alarm horn. They must be mobilizing you think, as you hastily don uniform and race for the wall. The enemy has finished construction some time during the night and you gape in awe as the first chill runs the length of your spine, the first of the "last" few chills ever to do so.

The alarm sounds anew. This time it sounds retreat which, within the confines of the keep, can only mean evacuate the outer wall, but you are as rooted in place as the wall itself, completely immobile and curiously detached as others race past frantically seeking shelter where none can exist. You merely stare vacantly as you watch the enemy align their cannons not towards the citadel but away from it towards the center of what you can now see is the mother of all drums. Although you have never even heard the words parabola or focal point your intuition tells you that the curved inner surface created by the triangular sections of skins will concentrate the sound of those cannons somewhere just inside the outer layer of rock and mortar which the wall you stand on is comprised, and that the small, (in comparison), hole in the center of this drum, allowing the cannon balls to pass harmlessly through it, will do little to lessen the impact.

Torch touches wick and you witness the flash from the first cannon to detonate and see the mighty shock wave soundlessly ripple the trampled grassland between them and you.

The last chill to ever course your spine is cut short.


[link]






       Are only guys named Smith allowed to work on the drum?
normzone, Jul 01 2006
  

       It's where the expression blow them to smithereens comes from.+
zeno, Jul 01 2006
  

       //I hate these long stories// [BJS] - what's wrong? finger wore a hole in the screen as you were reading ?   

       As for the idea.... are there other horrible sounds laying in wait to finish the job....? eg giant nails scraping down a blackboard +
xenzag, Jul 01 2006
  

       I tried to make one of these once from a coarse sieve.
po, Jul 01 2006
  

       Bet that was a strain.   

       Yeah, but you can collander any time and she'll answer.
normzone, Jul 01 2006
  

       I think I might join that club, just to escape the puns.
bungston, Jul 02 2006
  

       Would that we could all be as puree of heart.   

       My point is that this web site is supposed to be for ideas and inventions, not long stories...
BJS, Jul 02 2006
  

       [Word invention]   

       BJS, one can always vote against it.   

       [GumBob] - bit of a harsh rebuttal you gave there !!!
monojohnny, Jul 02 2006
  

       Ah, but how to put forth said idea [BJS]?   

       Having an actual original idea is like this little epiphany, where for the briefest of times one transcends the bounds of what one "knows" and just for that one instant connects with something beyond themselves. Where did this previously unknown concept come from? What random factors in an infinite array of possibilities had to align to create the seed of its conception? and how unlikely for the ground of that conception to be ones own mind rather than one of the minds of countless others who have come before with knowledge equal to or greater than ones own?
An idea is not a trivial thing. It is to be celebrated and shared not hoarded. In order to accomplish this it is ones prerogative, nay, duty to attempt to hold the attention of ones audience as we would wish for our attention to be held when we ourselves are the audience.
Could I have posted this idea as: [A big ass drum that recoils cannon booms to knock down rock walls.?] Of course I could but it would not be true to the idea. The imagery portrayed is how this particular idea came to me and for me to not make the attempt to do it justice would demean both myself and the intelligence of you all.
  

       Besides that, I've had little to no experience with creative writing before I stumbled across this site and I get a kick out of it.   

       A bit of a conundrum.
normzone, Jul 02 2006
  

       " [A big ass drum that recoils cannon booms to knock down rock walls.?]"   

       Is that what it is !!! ?   

       Brilliant.   

       Changing my vote ! [+]
monojohnny, Jul 02 2006
  

       [GumBob] huh ? - where did that go ? :)
monojohnny, Jul 02 2006
  

       What? I dunno.. the drum got it!
daseva, Jul 02 2006
  

       Maybe The Smiths could fire a focussed performance of The Queen is Dead before storming her bedroom.
wagster, Jul 02 2006
  

       PS: "other:general"? <slaps [2 fries] on the wrist>
wagster, Jul 03 2006
  

       2 of subdub's are in here too, is there a glitch?
po, Jul 03 2006
  

       I've heard that the absent_minded_32 virus has infected a few users.
wagster, Jul 03 2006
  

       I did'nt see a suitable category for this one. I thought maybe, Other: Energy: Sound. Oop, wait there is a Product: Weapon: Sonic though. <rubs wrist>   

       It's really something when the whole band gets together. The horn section knocked'em dead in Jericho.   

       this might be really useful, if i knew anybody who had a fortress i wanted to knock over.
carpeliam, Jul 03 2006
  

       Now we've met.
Muhahahahahaha!
  

       Musical power should only be used in self defense.
bneal27, Mar 18 2008
  
      
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