Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Children Multiplication System

Self control training for tired parents.
  (+6, -1)
(+6, -1)
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Sometimes children get out of control and its hard for parents to handle things. On some days one child feels like you're managing 10. Its easy on some days to wish you didn't have three or six children and opted to stop creating new life after only one or two or not at all.

The Children Multiplication System is wall and ceiling mirroring kit. Service men come out and cover every square inch of wall and ceiling surface in your home from the floor up with mirrors. CMS Service men may or may not install strobes and a disco ball.

Suddenly 3 children turns into more children reflections than any normal parent can handle for very long. Once a parent adapts (adapts = completely loses their cool)due to the sensory overload the service men come back to remove the mirrors from all wall and ceiling surfaces.

Now the parent gets to start feeling grateful that they only have their original actual amount of children.

vfrackis, Dec 10 2013

That reminds me of a story... http://www.google.c...uld+always+be+worse
It Could Always be Worse, by Margot Zemach [goldbb, Dec 11 2013]

[link]






       There is a more lifelike method called a "slumber party" where one's progeny invite multitudes of friends over and no one gets any sleep at all. + anyway.
csea, Dec 10 2013
  

       Better to have the squad turn up and remove the existing children. Permanently.
8th of 7, Dec 10 2013
  

       We always found that sleepovers made life much easier. Also, because they're reciprocated children can disappear for days at a time. It's an example of home ed socialisation.
nineteenthly, Dec 12 2013
  

       On the other hand, the average intelligence of teenagers in a group declines with the size of the group.
hippo, Dec 12 2013
  

       To be fair, the same factor applies to groups of adult humans.   

       // children can disappear for days at a time / /   

       Years would be better …
8th of 7, Dec 12 2013
  

       Or...your children could have children!
sninctown, Dec 12 2013
  
      
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