Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Combat Clown

Funnyman... OF DEATH!
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Nobody likes clowns. It's a fact. Really. But, clowns sure are distracting. I say, replace half the people in the SAS and the U.S. Army's Rangers with clowns. These clowns will drop by parachute much like the actual soldiers... but there the similarity ends! Upon touchdown they will go right! Left! Every which way! Where will they stop? Who knows? Who cares? As they run around in a micmac of unbridled non-hillarity (clowns are never funny) and chaos, the enemy forces will all stand up from their hiding places, scratch their heads, and mutter: "What the F..k?!" (or suitable local epithet) What they'll never know is that the real troops are coming up behind them with knives, guns, and blunt instruments with which to end their lives. Oh, and the clowns can explode. This is very important. They are kamikaze clowns. Must not forget that.
Madcat, Sep 15 2003

Insane Clown Posse http://www.insanecl...osse.com/detect.php
[Great Satan, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

baked. But unfortunately hasn't exploded...yet. http://www.whitehou...aq/20030501-15.html
[briandamage, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

[link]






       // Oh, and the clowns can explode. This is very important. They are kamikaze clowns //   

       What would make it funny for the rest of us is if the clowns didn't *know* they would explode.
DeathNinja, Sep 15 2003
  

       The Swiss guard?
RayfordSteele, Sep 15 2003
  

       In a combat situation, and licensed to kill, I would happily shoot a clown on sight. Clowns piss me off...   

       I will bun anything that mentions the shooting or self-destruction of clowns. (+)
X2Entendre, Sep 15 2003
  

       Sheesh, that's a lot of aggression coming out. Did a clown kill/kick a pet or loved one recently? Were you abducted by a clown as a child?
kevindimie, Sep 16 2003
  

       [kevindimie], are you a clown?
X2Entendre, Sep 16 2003
  

       baked. see link.
briandamage, Sep 16 2003
  

       //In a combat situation, and licensed to kill//   

       [X2E] - You're a nicer person than I am, then.
Detly, Sep 16 2003
  

       [UB] - Clearly they aren't dead, otherwise they wouldn't be able to vote themselves a payrise every few days.
Detly, Sep 16 2003
  

       I have this image of Dubya and Cheney and Rummy, in one of those clown cars, that rattles and farts around the place with wobbly wheels and bits falling off it, with the license plate "US ECNMY" at the front, and " FRN PLCY" at the back, whilst Blair stands on the side of the road with his thumb out, and a crowd of people armed with improvised explosive custard pies chase them out of town,.
briandamage, Sep 17 2003
  

       I can see it now: One little armored vehicle the size of a VW Beetle pulls up, and twenty Combat Clowns pile out. What a savings in hardware.
Ander, Sep 17 2003
  

       Hmmm... the go-anywhere beetle as an armored military weapon. Herbie Goes to Iraq?
RayfordSteele, Sep 17 2003
  

       The big floppy shoes and the baggy pants and everything can hold weapons, or at the very least C4 which in no way should be confused with 4C.   

       Deathninja, I think they should not know either, but I also think explosions should be triggered by the phraise, 'Hey there, you need a hug.' Then 3...2...1...BOOM! Or triggered by the sound of a balloon animal popping. I will give this a croissant just for the explosions.   

       //Did a clown kill/kick a pet or loved one recently?// Yes, yes and yes.   

       //Were you abducted by a clown as a child?//   

       Well no, but a couple of years ago I was. Still don't know how the bugger did it. Last I remember was I was sniffing his flower.
sartep, Sep 17 2003
  

       "sniffing his flower"? Is that prison lingo?
lostdog, Sep 17 2003
  

       Isn't "Insane Clown Posse" a bit redundant?
DeathNinja, Sep 17 2003
  

       At this point, I really must admit that I'm amazed this was recieved so well. Not that I'm suggesting I think my idea was poorly concieved. Oh no.
Madcat, Sep 19 2003
  

       I'll be happy to do that for you if you like.
waugsqueke, Sep 19 2003
  

       Oh yes [Madcat], waugsy is the expert... and always willing to cooperate.
Pericles, Sep 20 2003
  

       Several days late (as usual) but would Bush's clown car have axles of evil?
egbert, Sep 20 2003
  

       Thousand points of light from the clown car laser tracking system.   
      
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