h a l f b a k e r y
Expensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.
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At the Commando Cafe, your booth is a sandbag-fortified
bunker. You strap on your helmet and crouch-run along the
trenches as you approach it, to avoid the simulated machine
gun and mortar fire whizzing by just a few feet above you.
(To get to the bar requires some military crawling under
wire, but the drinks are very cheap.)
At the Commando Cafe, your camouflaged server drops down
into your bunker on a zip line, whether they're bringing you
your menu, your meal, some hot java, or just some extra
ammo. (If you're by the wall, they rappel.)
At the Commando Cafe, you can, if you wish, opt to retrieve
your order yourself. (Sign this waiver first, please.) This
involves a challenging obstacle course, and is guaranteed to
use up lots of calories and ensure that you'll have a healthy
appetite when - or if, I should say - you make it back to your
At the Commando Cafe, it's difficult sometimes to have a
conversation, what with the explosions and screams and all,
and the orderlies running by with stretchers, and the
sergeants stopping by occasionally to make sure your meal is
satisfactory, give you updates on the state of battle, and
order you to "eat that broccoli, soldier!!"
The Commando Cafe. It prepares you for the world outside.
||Not an underwear-optional café then?
||It might ALSO be underwear optional. For those idiotic
enough to risk doing that in that environment....
||I havé détérminéd éxpériméntally that many of thé cafés around héré aré thé typé hippo déscribés.
||Also less overhead than what smendler describes.
||coffee drinkers only; no teabaggers allowed on the premises.
||[+] So long as there is an all-terrain cake trolley.
||I'd tone it down a bit. Maybe just the bar area is mayhem, but even then, there's something wrong with tucking into a steak and chips from the trenches.